So Fair And Foul A Day
by thesunshinekid
Summary: This vampire coven was living a comfortable, easy life - until a too-friendly human threatens everything. They call in the Cullens to help - but will it be too late?
1. Old Friends

**Author's**** Note: ****Hello ****again! ****This**** new ****story**** of mine ****deviates ****from ****the**** light ****spirit**** of "Spring ****Cleaning ****with ****the**** Cullens" – ****it ****definitely**** has ****moments ****where ****it ****veers ****into ****the ****realm**** of drama and ****angst****. My ****premise ****was: ****what ****if**** a ****vampire ****was ****deeply ****religious**** as a ****human**** – and ****his**** "****gift****" ****was ****his ****faith? ****How ****would ****that ****play ****out? ****The ****character**** of ****Josh ****was ****born. ****However, ****Josh ****needed**** a ****coven****, and ****his ****sisters ****came ****about. ****Molly**** and Lisa are ****two ****opposite ****ends**** of ****the ****spectrum**** – as ****many ****sisters**** are. ****Don't ****worry**** – ****there ****will ****be ****plenty**** of ****Cullen ****action**** as ****well!**

**This ****story ****does ****alternate ****point**** of ****view ****every ****chapter, ****between ****two ****characters**** – I ****will ****always ****make ****note**** of ****the ****change, ****but ****be ****aware**** of ****it.**

**With ****that****, a ****disclaimer: ****This ****story ****is**** in no ****way ****intended ****to ****either ****preach ****or ****offend.**

**And, of ****course****: I ****own ****neither ****Twilight ****nor ****its ****respective ****characters.**

Chapter One

Old Friends

_Josh's P.O.V_

"Happy Birthday!" A chorus of voices called from the other end of the handheld. I winced at the volume.

"I'll turn off the speaker if you're not careful," I warned, with a playful growl. "Is this a make-Josh-go-deaf conspiracy?"

"Something like that," Jasper Hale chuckled, before his overly exuberant wife, Alice Cullen, took over.

"Has it really been a century? You should get a telegram from the Queen!"

"The telegram died long before the Queen herself did. It wasn't even practical." Rosalie Hale muttered, not quite as excited as her sister.

"Thanks for making me feel like some old geezer."

"Oh, Josh honey, they don't mean it -." Esme Cullen, ever the loving mother figure, tried to console me before I cut her off.

"I'm kidding, you're all ancient in comparison to me, anyway."

"Well…" I heard Emmett Cullen trail off in the background, before turning to ask his gathered family, "Where's Bella? And her idiot of a husband?"

As Emmett began ranting about "stupid, mind-reading vampires" and Edward's latest crime, I noticed that my two favorite Cullens' voices were missing from the excited buzz on the other end. Almost simultaneously, a sharp rap on the door echoed throughout the house. Lisa, my older sister, ushered our guests into our modest home.

"Surprise!" Edward and Bella yelled into my ear, confirming my conspiracy theory, before assuring Carlisle and Esme that they had arrived without problems, with very little traffic on the two-hundred-mile trip.

It was always considered a good day in the Johnson household when the Cullens came to visit. Lisa, the reluctant leader of our coven, liked to talk with the intelligent and similar-minded Bella. Molly saw her as an advice-giving older sister – and Bella, forever the "baby sister" of the Cullen clan, was more than happy to oblige. According to Bella, Edward and I were "kindred, moody spirits" – though she didn't know why. Regardless, when my two best friends came to visit, the entire atmosphere around the house changed from one of monotony, to one of surreptitious adventure.

OOOOOOOOO

Three vampires sitting in a tree is quite a sight to behold. The sun filtered through the leaves, making sparkling patterns dance on our solid skin – like Christmas lights in the daytime. I rested my back against the sturdy trunk, perched on the topmost branches that would hold my weight; Edward sat a few branches below me, and Bella lazed another few lower. We'd spent four hours catching up – I hadn't physically seen them in nearly a decade.

The three of us had history. As a newborn vampire, it was said that I developed a conscience of my own accord. My unmoving faith in God as a human was my magnified trait as a vampire; I believed it was wrong to kill, no matter how thirsty I was, and had jumped at the chance to learn self-control from the like-minded Cullens. Bella was young at the time, too – with only a year of abstaining, she still struggled to spend any amount of time around humans. We became each other's support group, complaining to each other and relying on comforting commiseration. Her mate became my closest friend; we were both comrades and just as often, culprits, much to Lisa and Esme's chagrin. While Edward was a music maestro and I was a literature nut, we got along well; Edward had access to some of my favorite musicians from my human years – Christian artists that were hard to find – and in return, I was frequently called upon to provide literary criticisms for my best friend's English papers. In my early days, Edward and I spent hours debating the validity of the term "Christian rock" – to this day, I maintained that David Crowder was one of the greatest musicians of that era.

Since I saw them last, Bella had graduated from med school at Columbia to help Carlisle keep current in the rapidly moving medical world. To save himself from boredom, Edward had catalogued all of his compositions and done extensive research on each of his favorite musicians, before finally giving in and spending two years studying at Julliard, conveniently near his wife. Bella eagerly described the adventures of her first time living in an apartment in New York City, surrounded by the fast-paced culture and arts. Sadly, the secrecy of our existence kept most vampires far from the latest news and trends – it was exciting for Bella to finally see the city lights.

The topic meandered to my own doings these ten years; as the story currently went, our parents died in a tragic house explosion a year and a half earlier. With the money from both the inheritance and the insurance, we bought a moderately sized home a few miles outside of the small, wealthy town. We were far enough from civilization to feel comfortable, and close enough for our story to seem plausible. To the town, I was a straight-A-average seventeen-year-old with a low-paying job and a saddening back story. These friends knew me as a physically nineteen-year-old vampire of really one-hundred and nineteen years. I had spent most of my time studying some of the lesser-known theologians of the past few centuries. My enthusiasm for Biblical history and doctrine was evident in the tomes that filled more than half of our library.

The conversation eventually settled upon what Jasper Hale once termed as "vampire philosophy."

"Is it fair be punished for something that's not your fault?" Bella wondered aloud, recalling Edward's tale of Emmett's less-than-cheerful stage, after he slipped up seven years earlier. Emmett claimed he would never be able to resist a singer the way Edward had – and Carlisle wondered that singers were more common than we'd realized, since human-drinking vampires would hardly notice the added temptation.

Edward chuckled darkly as he responded, "Didn't anyone tell you? Life isn't fair."

"Really," She glared at her mate, "No one chooses their height or shoe size – so can vampires really be punished just for existing?"

"It's not the existence that's the issue, so much as the food source." Edward explained.

"Again," Bella pointed out, "no one consciously chooses to like, say, strawberry over kiwi, or to be lactose intolerant, or an alcoholic. Things like those are in the genes."

"I'll follow up on the alcoholic example," I said, as Edward gave me a stony look, displeased that we were ganging up against him, "the alcoholic knows that he's predisposed to getting drunk – but he is capable of choosing to drink something else – water, for instance."

"What about those inevitable moments of weakness?" Edward countered. "What about when our alcoholic chooses to have a beer while watching the game with some friends – pretty soon, he could be driving drunk and kill someone, or go home and beat his wife. Now he is discouraged. He's no superman. Should he even bother fighting it anymore? He will, but he knows that he is weak; that he will make the same mistake again. Give yourself eternity, and you have no hope. We deserve punishment, because we're going to fall."

"I'm sure that comforted our anguished brother. Existentialism is outdated." Bella muttered, slightly annoyed – in her case, his argument didn't hold. In over a century, she'd never once fallen to the temptation of a human's blood – a stipulation of her "power." Carlisle claimed that her intense will-power and self-control as a human made her determination entirely unshakeable as a vampire; once Bella decided upon something, she was not easily swayed – to this day, her husband was the only one who had succeeded – and only once. It was rare for a vampire to be so motivated against killing, but Bella had decided long ago that she would stick to the Cullens diet.

"You say our existence is meaningless – we are doomed and damned regardless – but if God is powerful to condemn, certainly he holds the power to heal. What of His forgiveness?"

"Good question, Joshua. What about His forgiveness?" He taunted. Faith was the only sore point in our friendship. Edward, prone to gloominess, couldn't shake the belief that God wanted nothing to do with him. From my experience, I couldn't disagree more.

"Seriously guys," Bella caught our attention by throwing sticks at us, "We start school in three days. We should hunt."

"Way to take our minds off the topic." Nonetheless, Edward cheered up a little at the offer of a distraction. The Cullen boys were always eager to try new hunting grounds, and the mountains around our hometown were laden with wildlife.

As we meandered back towards the house, I was hit with a sudden realization. "'We' are going to school?"

"Another surprise," Edward laughed, clapping me on the back. "We'll be here until winter break."

"Lisa made sure that we were enrolled in school, all of that – we're old family friends, staying with you because our overbearing adoptive father isn't entirely confident that you are really managing fine on your own." Bella rattled off like it was old news. I stifled a laugh – Lisa and Carlisle were very old friends – older than the townsfolk would ever assume. Lisa attended a small, private college on the other side of the valley; the gossip-eager town whispered that she'd been accepted to three separate Ivy League schools before her parents' death, but had foregone the opportunity to take care of her two younger siblings. With her shoulder length, dishwater blonde hair and practical jeans-and-tee style, Lisa passed for twenty, although she was really a twenty-two year old. The youngest of the coven, she remembered little of her life until Carlisle Cullen had found her, wandering in confusion through Montana forty-six years ago. She frequently thanked the Cullens for protecting her from relative insanity in her early years.

"And," Edward added, "To everyone back home, William and Mary goes back early."

"Excellent," I approved. The Cullens were masters at excuses and stories. On more than one unhappy occasion, they'd helped our family to relocate and restart our lives.

I had no idea that we would need their help so soon.

OOOOOOOOO

_"Happy Birthday to me,_

_Happy Birthday to me,_

_Happy Birthday Josh, your life's a-__changin__' now_

_Happy Birthday to me."_

**Author's**** Note****: I ****know ****that****, as a ****writer****, in ****order ****to ****develop**** my ****own ****style**** and ****voice****, I ****need ****to ****write**** more; I ****need ****to ****keep ****playing ****with ****words ****until**** I can ****make ****them**** my ****own****. So, I ****want ****your ****comments. ****What ****was ****your ****first ****impression? ****Did ****you ****read ****this ****because ****it ****looked ****interesting, ****or ****because ****I'm ****on ****your ****Author ****Alert****? Do ****you ****have ****any ****advice**** – ****things ****that ****you ****noticed ****need ****work ****or ****tips ****from ****your ****own ****experience? ****What ****did ****you ****like? ****What ****didn't ****you ****like****? In ****the ****great ****words**** of Elle Woods: "****Speak**** up!"**


	2. New Kids

**Author's Note: Here is the**** second chapter. I want you to know**** that my characters are wonderfully flawed –**** this is very obvious in the beginning of this chapter. ****I realized, while editing, that Molly's narration sound****s**** very different for a Twilight ****fic**** – ****her thoughts will reflect her two separate ages, physical and actual. ****This chapter is my longest, and maybe one of the most important.**

**I forgot last chapter to ****give her credit**** – lots and lots of thanks to ****leiahlaloa****, who worked as my editor for this story.**

Chapter Two:

New Kids

_Molly's P.O.V._

Alice always says that a light skirt is perfect for the first day of school, and so the red tints in the pattern on the flowing mauve fabric contrasted brilliantly with my red tank top. A vintage denim jacket was a must – both classy and casual; I could blend into the crowd at will, but anyone who took the time to notice me would be unable to disregard my natural beauty.

Lisa could never understand the importance of clothing. Though her strength was her analytical mind – able to process numbers and science and other infinitesimally small things – the other side of it was her complete disregard for style. She lucked out, always playing the part of a college student, which went well with her reluctantly-designer jeans and plain colored shirts. Bella, too, thought it ridiculous to waste the Cullens' money on such trivialities as clothes – she climbed out of Josh's simple and functional car wearing a pair of jeans that she ripped while hunting, old tennis shoes, an overly-large jacket boasting Columbia University's name, with her beautiful brunette hair in a ponytail. I shook my head in despair, though at hearing my thoughts Edward was quick to remind me that the fewer men staring at his wife, the better.

Josh and Edward had a similar sense of style – "designer causal," as Alice called it. Lisa and Bella mocked them – "Abercrombie models," referring to the popular clothing store of the late 20th and early 21st century, known for hiring employees that looked like models. Abercrombie and Fitch bankrupted in 2067, along with many of its other major competitors, when Modular came on the scene; the department store dedicated solely to teens was known to carry every style, size, and price. I didn't think my sister's disdain totally fair – vampires can't help looking amazing all the time. Why hide it? Lisa would retort that I was stuck at sixteen and thus naturally and eternally superficial. I would, in return, take no offense – I was older than her by one hundred and sixteen years anyway.

Edward Cullen dressed in nice, clean-cut items – we were both from a period in time where respectability was paramount. However, he had probably pulled on his jeans at the last minute, though they sat on his hips like a photographer had carefully arranged them. The muscles underneath his fitted black t-shirt and tan leather jacket would intimidate even the largest of football players, and leave all the girls swooning. Bella said she didn't mind too much, since she wasn't the one that had to hear their thoughts.

Josh, my easy mannered older brother, made use of the knowledge that he would look tantalizing in anything he wore, no matter how ridiculous – Lisa frequently called him a "goofball." He dressed in brown board shorts and flip-flops, a nod to the ending summer, despite the ocean being more than a thousand miles away. His matching maroon polo shirt, though looser than his best friend's, left little more to the imagination. He hadn't taken the time to brush his messy dark curly locks, yet they sat in perfect disarray. I loved my brother and his odd sense of humor, but our relationship was strained; he was as loyal to his God as I was to my art. I knew that he would do anything for me, but sometimes his caution and protection felt like a snub from his holier-than-thou side, trying to keep me from treacherous sin.

I slid from the backseat of the dark blue vehicle and surveyed the filling parking lot. Amongst the richer citizens of the town, our car was nothing special – it managed to remain more inconspicuous than we ourselves did. Though many a cheerleader or jock dressed in stylish designer names, we always managed to outdo their efforts, forever looking absolutely stunning. The current style emphasized the motto of the digital age, "less is more." Simple colors and fewer items made up our outfits – accessories were out. However, teenagers would always be insecure, hiding their blemishes behind make up or the latest bag, shoes or car.

I claimed that I understood teenagers the best. I became a vampire on the night of my sixteenth birthday, nearly two hundred years before. At five-foot-seven-inches, I passed for anything between fourteen and nineteen; I didn't complain much about constantly reliving high school – I was never going to be older than a teenager, but I understood them better than they themselves did. I spent the second half of my first hundred years learning to abstain from human blood with a vegetarian coven in Denali. I was successful enough to have found a few shallow human acquaintanceships in some of the students in my art class, the class I was most passionate about – a result of the enhancement of my creativity when I became a vampire. These acquaintances knew better than to ask me personal questions, but we could talk casually about the exploits of Sydney Ritz or the newest on-screen hottie, Donnie Fowler. About to enter yet another sophomore year, the "cooler" kids in my school were still trying their level best to find some dirt on Molly Johnson's pristine image – I thought that our guests might stir up some scintillating controversy.

There were more than a few stares coming from the bewildered freshmen, and some rather curious looks from the upperclassmen towards Edward and Bella. The rumors of the new arrivals had spread quickly through the small town, always so eager for new gossip. The beautiful "newbies" were a source of entertainment to these people – rumors of their wealth and mentions of plastic surgery abounded; though cosmetic surgery had become common place in the past century, the topic was still taboo. I noticed that more than a few discouraged girls turned away when Edward took Bella's hand in his.

I smiled and nodded in acknowledgement to a few members of the art department as we waited in the lines for this year's class schedules. Josh and I had perfected lunch times by choosing isolating talents – instead of sitting alone and conspicuous in the cafeteria, we hid inside classrooms, working "intensely" on respective projects – no one noticed that we failed to eat anything because no one struck up a conversation. I acted as lunchtime teacher's assistant for the art department; the creative genius, I was always drawing or painting, and frequently sewing or tailoring my own outfits. Josh edited the school newspaper, spending hours in the library or on a computer. Bella would join Josh on the newspaper staff this year, and Edward would sit in the library at lunch time, "studying," in order to free his afternoons to work at Modular with Josh.

I was now a sophomore; young enough to still be stuck in P.E., but old enough to start taking A.P. classes. I groaned inwardly at my first class; science bored me to no end, and I would start every day with Chemistry.

Bella poked her husband and laughed at some inside joke, "Look! I have biology right after lunch!" Though she was physically older than her mate, she posed as a junior to have separate classes from him - to keep suspicious eyes from paying too much attention to their all-too-evidently-close relationship.

As I wandered the halls, I noticed that another new kid had entered the building. He must have been a late comer – new residents were big news in the small town. He was slight, but good-looking for a human; short, spiked brown hair, defined face, and kindly blue eyes. He wore jeans, real checkered Vans – hard to find nowadays - and a black vintage concert tee; he had the look of a punk, but was probably a true fan of good music. He was welcomed by Tony Trapp, the youngest member of the varsity football team, and generally acknowledged school hunk – aside from the vampires present. Tony welcomed him, and introduced the boy to the gaggle of giggling girls behind him – referring to the boy as, "Nathan, my cousin."

Behind Nathan stood a shorter girl with similar brown hair and soft oceanic eyes, evidently his twin sister, "Natasha". She dressed simply in a plain denim skirt and a navy-blue shirt – simple and cute, because she was unsure of her status in this new school. My attention caught by the fresh faces, I opened my locker, successfully moving closer to catch the conversation. A few times last year, Tony and his team had gone out of their way to try and make my life miserable; they couldn't understand why any pretty girl would so flatly reject their advances. Only a firm understanding of the inner workings of the teenage mind, along with the knowledge that I could kill all of them in an instant, kept me smiling. I hoped that the cute boy wouldn't fall in with this bad crowd. He looked too good for them.

I jumped nearly a mile in the air when Josh interrupted my eavesdropping. "Are you no longer the prettiest girl in school, Molly?" He teased, ruffling my bouncy dark curls, adding too low to be heard without supernatural hearing, "and beaten by a human."

"Be nice," Edward pretended to come to my rescue, "she's more interested in the little boy."

"Edward!" Bella chided him, actually coming to my aid. "It's not nice to listen to peoples thoughts."

"I'm just speaking from experience," he shook his head for emphasis, "don't get mixed up with humans Molly. They're bad for your health."

Bella continued reprimanding him as I hugged my brother goodbye and escaped to the science wing. One of the first to the class, I found my seat in the middle of the room, flipping through the text I had picked up – old and outdated, I'd used it more than once before in other schools. The American school system found that students responded better to good old paper-and-ink books, though we were required to type our work on our handhelds. Bored, I plugged the device into the desk's power port and listened to the gossiping girls sitting down behind me.

"Oh, my gosh," a tall blonde named Morgan began, "two hot new guys in one day."

"I still maintain that Joshua Johnson is the best looking guy in school." Her companion, Athena, pronounced.

"But he doesn't date. Nathan is hot, new, and single, and - look! He's in this class." Morgan lowered her voice some.

"Did you see that other guy - with the amazing hair? He looks pretty much taken."

"Molly?" I sat upright when Morgan leaned forward from her seat behind me. I noticed a quick wave of her scent – slightly reminiscent of daisies – before focusing on her words.

"Who was that amazing guy with your brother this morning? Does he have a girlfriend?"

I gritted my teeth before smiling, pretending to be surprised that she had spoken to me. It was hard to successfully paint myself as too shy instead of too proud, to safely keep away from too much human contact. The town assumed that we kept to ourselves because we were still in mourning, traumatized by the tragedy that had befallen our family.

"That's Edward Cullen; his adoptive father was good friends with our dad." I began to explain. "His girlfriend's the brunette you might have seen him walking with, Bella Swan – a foster child of the Cullen's."

After the shock of the almost-incestual relationship wore off, Morgan thanked me, no doubt for the good gossip. I noticed the new boy sitting next to me – his last name was Lancaster. I smiled in his direction, before mentally critiquing the wardrobes of my classmates, an Alice-tried-and-tested tactic to keep sane during monotonous classes.

After the standard "download the class syllabus and have your parents sign it" speech, we were left to our own devices for the remaining few minutes. I pulled my old-fashioned sketchbook and pencils from my paint-splotched shoulder bag, and settled in to finish a rendition of Josh's face on his hundredth birthday, copied from a photograph.

"Boyfriend?" Asked a tenor voice from my left. I turned to see sea-blue eyes and struggled not to get lost in them. The overwhelming smell of "manly deodorant" shook me back to my senses.

"Brother," I replied lightly. I decided that the new kid deserved some courtesy – he didn't yet know that his cousin detested shy little Molly Johnson.

"It's very good – it almost looks real." He commented. I thanked him and turned back to my pencil, before being bombarded by another question.

"Do you know that you're the prettiest girl I've ever seen?"

I was taken aback by his forwardness for a moment, before replying, somewhat curtly, "Thank you."

Thankfully, the bell rang before Nathan could speak more, and I hurried from the room to my next class – English, a subject that changed with time, providing both new literature and new ideas. I stared at my desk as students filed into the classroom. Why would a human boy speak to me?

OOOOOOOOO

_"Something is rotten in the state of Denmark."_

_- Hamlet, Act 1, Scene 4, Line 100._

**Author's Note: I enjoy getting feedback! I have 31 author alerts, ****and I get new story alerts frequently**** – (guilt-trip moment) a comment from all of you would be nice! After all, everyone has an opin****ion. I introduced a main ****character in this chapter –**** she's going to be alternating narration with Josh. D****o you like her? Does she have you theorizing as to what's going to happen? **


	3. Fault

**Author's Note: ****I'm bored, and I realized that this story certainly isn't half as popular as Spring Cleaning; not enough to warrant waiting a few days to post – that, and I've already got the story completed, which makes me antsy. ****The information in this chapter will figure in really importantly later – so pay attention! **

Chapter Three:

Fault

_Josh's P.O.V_

"Slapjack!" I yelled across the dining room. We had settled on spending the evening with our favorite card game. Requiring speed and quick eyes, slapjack was the perfect game for a group of vampires, with the added benefit that we couldn't crush or break a pack of cards. Lisa marked the score on the wallboard – a digitized version of a whiteboard that smelled better and was much more efficient to clean.

"I'm bored." Molly complained, with a toss of her curls. "Can we play Crazy Uno?"

"Sorry, Edward can see your cards." Bella explained. Molly slumped on the table in a sign of mock-defeat, muttering to herself.

"Oh, come on!" Edward complained. "I don't cheat at everything."

"Yes, you do." We all agreed. He took on the same resigned pose as Molly, muttering as well.

"It's a good thing sometimes," Bella tried to lighten the mood. "You're great at discerning character."

"Exceptionally true," I agreed. "For instance, tell us about that new boy Molly had her eye on this morning."

Edward chuckled before answering. "He was glad to see his cousin, that's for sure. He kept wondering if people would 'find out' – my guess is that he wasn't too popular back home."

"Then he'll do anything to be a member of the 'in' crowd here. I guess he doesn't know the rules yet; he told me that I was the prettiest girl he'd ever seen." Molly piped up, "We have chemistry together."

"Isn't it a bit early to tell?" I teased. It was unlikely that he'd met vampires before; with the exception of the Cullens and ourselves, there were few able to live so publicly. I felt a twinge of surprise at his bluntness – not too many teenage boys would so openly compliment a girl they'd just met – not without expecting anything in return.

"Did you talk about anything else?" Lisa wondered, her voice full of concern for her sister. Molly was smart, but at barely sixteen, she had no mate and few friends that shared her interests. We knew that she loved our unorthodox little family, but she craved normalcy at times – it would be too easy for her to give too much away.

"He commented on one of my sketches, said that he liked it. Not much more." She answered. "He wanted to ask more questions, but the bell rang."

"Be careful," Bella warned, with similar worry in her voice. Though Molly was far older in vampire terms, Bella saw her as the little sister she never had.

"I don't think I'll talk to him again," Molly smiled – a little sadly. "Tony will fill him in pretty quickly on who not to hang out with around here, the Johnsons being at the top of that list."

"I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation." I quoted quietly. Molly shot me an angered look. She held teenage social standards in the highest regard – to her, popularity was good.

"That wasn't what you were thinking this morning." Edward told her, somewhat sternly, ignoring my own comment.

"What do you mean?" She narrowed her eyes, genuinely confused.

"Everyone's got their own way of discerning character – you identify people by their clothing choices. You noted his slightly punky style, but given his pleasant demeanor decided that he was more of an honest music fan than any real rebel." My friend explained. "You thought that he was too good to fall in with Tony's crowd."

"I just don't want to make more enemies," Molly sighed, with a shake of her curls.

I was hit with sudden anger at the thought. I hated the way those boys irritated my sister – it was only my rather obvious strength that kept them from hurting her further. I growled. Those boys brought up the few unpleasant memories I had from my human life.

"Be sure to tell me if anyone decides to be a jerk towards you this year." I told her honestly. "And I will hurt them, more than a little."

"Don't do anything stupid." Lisa looked at me with pleading eyes. She knew that I would do anything to protect my family – and had done so in the past. I gave her an exasperated look that told her I'd back down, but not willingly.

"If it helps, I'll keep listening for any potential problems." Edward suggested, and then added so only I could hear. "I don't want to see her hurt either."

_Thanks. _I knew that he'd heard, and turned to the messy cards scattered across the table.

"Does anyone else not feel like cleaning up right now?"

Everyone quickly agreed and dispersed, Lisa and Bella to watch a movie on the digital wallboard in the living room and Molly to her old-fashioned easel in the attic. Edward and I flopped on the couches in my room – two dark blue couches, the only distinctly colored items. Lisa, as the physically oldest, took charge of decorating decisions – she was minimalist by nature, rather than an observer of current style. The entire house was painted in an eggshell white, and all the furniture was simple oak.

We sat in silence, occupied by our own musings. I let my mind wander to the sister I'd lost to the same vampire that didn't quite finish me off. Sarah looked a lot like Lisa, but was closer to Molly's age. I remembered her first boyfriend – how I'd followed them to the restaurant he took her to. She'd yelled at me for it, but later thanked me for caring when she found out that he had cheated on her. We both knew why it even mattered that I cared - Sarah wasn't the first sister I'd lost.

Lydia had been five, and I was nine. Our mother was shoe shopping, and we'd been bored. I was supposed to watch her, but I became distracted, and she'd disappeared. Her body was found not far from the mall, in an empty field. The day that the police showed up at our door with the news, I promised God that I would take care of my sister, so that she could live the happy life she wanted.

"Do you ever feel that way about Alice and Rosalie?" I suddenly asked Edward, "Like you'd kill anyone who threatened them, because they're too good to be hurt?"

"Certainly," He nodded, "Though, admittedly, not frequently. What with Emmett around and all, not many people dare provoke us."

A laugh overtook my worries for a moment - Emmett had yet to meet his match in brute strength - but all too soon we were silent.

"You're still thinking about them." Edward acknowledged. I nodded, before quietly voicing my thoughts.

"I was supposed to be watching Lydia, when she was kidnapped. Two weeks later I was at her funeral – I was only nine; I didn't really understand it all. But when I was nineteen, I did, and still I couldn't save Sarah from that red-eyed fiend. I feel, in part, responsible for their deaths. I know that God doesn't hold me responsible, so why should I torture myself? Still – now, I am capable of protecting my sisters."

"Plenty of people are naturally cruel Josh." Edward moved to sit upright, "and they will be just as cruel to Molly, no matter how capable you are of stopping them."

"But I _can_ stop them," I pointed out.

"That's right." Edward said, but the tone of his voice told me that he didn't agree. "You can't protect her from everything, and you'll only feel worse when you do fail. I know that firsthand. Bella tells me that I'm a masochist. I tell her that I'm a guy – it's in the genes. Why won't you just trust God with this, the way you keep reminding all the rest of us to?"

I decided to change the subject. I didn't like that Edward understood my weaknesses. As steadfastly as I believed in God and had faith in his goodness, I had the hardest of times trusting him with what I felt were my responsibilities. "Speaking of jeans, how do you think you'll hold up against the drooling female population of this small town?"

My friend chuckled, relieved for the new topic as well. He had joined me in working at Modular to keep up appearances; most seventeen year olds need some spare cash. Unlike the Cullens, our family didn't have the same access to unlimited resources; we lived off our part time jobs. However, we spent our money differently from the humans, and had accumulated quite a lot in the past few decades.

"At school, I've got my girl; at work…" Edward trailed off.

"You wish you could hide behind the register like I do." I finished for him.

"Something like that." He nodded, hair flopping his eyes.

"Why don't you just cut that?" I suggested.

"It's why they hired me," He joked, lowering his voice, but not enough. "It's part of my boyish charm that draws all the ladies into the store."

"I heard that!" Bella barreled in from downstairs and slapped her husband upside the head. "Idiot," she muttered before turning to me, "I like his hair as it is, thank you very much."

I laughed and adjusted myself on the couch, before I heard Lisa remind her friend. "Boys will be boys."

We both growled in response, and then settled to wait out the early morning.

OOOOOOOOO

_"The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars,_

_But in __ourselves__…" _

_-Julius Caesar, Act 1, Scene 2, Lines 147-48_

_Quote in chapter: Philippians 4:12_

**Author's**** Note: ****Three ****chapters**** in; ****what**** do ****you ****have ****to ****say****? Are ****you ****bored****? Are ****you ****catching ****the ****foreshadowing****? Are ****any ****points ****slightly ****confusifying?**


	4. Friends

Chapter Four:

Friends

_Molly's P.O.V_

I pretended to read the history of the development of the "digitized world". Lisa was the science genius; she would have enjoyed the activity. I withheld a snicker – I doubted anyone else in the classroom remembered days before the Internet Purge of 2020.

When the rest of the class became occupied with whispers and giggles, I pretended to finish my reading and returned the textbook to the pile in the corner – though books were proven more effective in education, they were also more expensive, so the students had to share copies.

I was glad to get to my sketchbook. Rosalie Hale had asked me to design her next wedding dress. Bella had reminded me that it might be a while before the wedding actually took place, but for now I was glad for the occupation.

"What's that?" asked an impetuous voice from my left. I shuddered – Nathan smelled like he had bathed in Axe that morning. Though he'd spent much time with Tony Trapp and his team of clones this past month, he had yet to stop talking to me. There were twenty minutes left of class; I would struggle to ignore him.

"Edward Cullen's sister asked me to design her wedding dress." I spoke, refusing to look into his adorable eyes. "We're old friends." _Really old friends, actually_.

"It's very nice." He said, leaning over my arm to look at it. I grunted; the sketch was more than nice. "I guess you like to draw. Can I see your others?"

I shook my head, and so as not to seem rude added, "An artist doesn't like to display unfinished work."

"What about that picture of your brother? How did that turn out?" He prodded. I grimaced – I needed to switch topics.

"It's okay. It's hanging on our food unit at home." I said sarcastically, though he seemed to take me seriously. Men liked to talk about themselves. "Do you have any hobbies?"

"Not really," He said, his voice all too chipper, "I listen to lots of music. Sometimes I write songs – but nothing that could ever be as beautiful as your work. Or you."

I cringed, "Thank you."

"Tell me about your family," He pushed, "are they as intriguing as you are?"

"My parents died in a freak house explosion a year and a half ago. My sister takes care of us." I spoke plainly.

"I'm so sorry!" Nathan placed his hand on my shoulder – I shrugged it off. "Does it hurt to talk about them?"

"Lots." I nodded, and sighed for dramatic effect. "Tell me about your family."

He finally took the bait, and spoke for the remaining fifteen minutes about his parents' divorce, and his subsequent decision to live with his aunt, Tony's mother. When the bell rang, I dashed outside and realized that I'd been holding my breath.

"What's up?" Bella came to my side, before asking in a voice too low to be caught by human ears, "Were you attacked by the cologne fairy?"

"Yeah," I gave a fake shudder, "by the name of Nathan. He won't leave me alone."

"Of course he won't." She laughed, "You are the prettiest girl he's ever seen."

I sidestepped into a bathroom, where I pulled my untamable curls into a bun. "He's obviously not met too many vampires. I'm definitely not the prettiest of the bunch."

"Don't knock yourself down;" Bella turned me to look in the mirror, "You are absolutely beautiful. Don't let some jerk and his friends make you think otherwise."

"That's easy for you to say," we returned to the hallway. "You have someone that worships the very ground you walk on."

"You would be gorgeous, vampire or not." She said, as we walked to the English building. Before she entered her own classroom, she reminded me, "He'll give up eventually."

"I hope so," I muttered as I slid into the back row of my own classroom.

OOOOOOOOO

Nathan Lancaster did not give up. Each day he questioned me about my favorite foods (I explained that I had a gluten allergy and my diet was particular), my favorite movies (I liked the classics, of course), and other mundane aspects of my equally mundane daily life. Every time that he spoke to me, I managed to divert the conversation towards him – and he would become less annoying. He would talk about a new band he'd discovered, or something funny that happened the other day ("You just had to be there!"), and he reminded me of my own brother when he spoke of his twin sister.

"You're so much like her. A little quiet – a hard shell to break. I'm glad you're letting me get to know you. Every girl needs friends."

I smiled uneasily as he continued. It wasn't safe to be this close to a human – yet there were moments when I was glad for someone, outside of my tight inner vampire circle, to talk to. I didn't like him in any romantic sense – but he actually wanted to speak with me – that was unusual within itself. Nathan was a nice, even-tempered boy. I sincerely wished that we could be friends, and I hated that my indifferent attitude hurt him.

"Do you want to sit with us at lunch today?" Nathan offered. "I know that Tony and his guys bug you, but they're just joking around. I won't let them irritate you."

As with every day, I refused, reminding him, "I'm the art T.A. at lunch. Someone has to clean up the mess the freshmen make."

However, at lunchtime that day, I made a beeline for the journalism office. "Joshua!" I called as I poked my head through the slightly-ajar door. Instead, I got Bella's reply.

"Let's walk," She steered me out of the room and onto the dim campus grounds. Sitting safely under an oak tree, Bella explained.

"Josh has physics before lunch. I heard the entire class got delayed."

"Ah," I played with my shoelaces. "That can't be pleasant – he hates physics."

"Ugh, me too." She agreed. "What were you so worked up about?"

"Nathan won't stop." I slumped against the tree. "He just keeps at it – asking questions, talking about how much I need friends, inviting me to eat lunch with him. I didn't ask for a puppy dog!"

"I've been there." She nodded, remembering the adoring suitors of her past life. "And I have no idea how to help."

"The worst part is that he's a great guy," I sighed, "I feel like I've been leading him on or something – but I've done everything I can to indicate that I'm not interested!"

Bella sat in silence, at a loss for advice. I looked towards the cloudy sky – this was a depressing, yet safe, place for us.

"Edward says that Nathan hasn't noticed anything horrendously unusual about you." She finally spoke. I felt a wave of relief – at least our cover wasn't blown. In a world so digitized and impersonal, perfect-looking people with odd habits were a bit more easily overlooked, and vampire lore was a thing of the past.

"It's still not safe to be this close to him." I stood up to walk back to the buildings, "I'm going to just break all ties. Ignore him completely, ask for a new seat in class, and maybe even switch math periods…"

"That' a' girl," Bella pulled me into a hug. "Don't feel too bad. You're keeping him from getting hurt."

"Yeah," I nodded, feeling slightly better, but not enough to assuage my conflicted thoughts. True, it was dangerous for a human to pay too close attention to us – but was it so wrong to want a friend?

OOOOOOOOO

_"Frailty, thy name is woman!" _

_- Hamlet, Act 1, Scene 2, Line 150_

**Author's**** Note: ****What**** are ****your ****feelings ****on ****Molly? ****On ****Nathan? ****As usual, ****feedback ****is ****enthusiastically ****welcomed****. Look forward ****to ****the ****next ****chapter**** – ****it**** introduces ****the ****conflict.**


	5. Stake Out

**Author's Note: My pretties! I know better than to post on a saturday, but to quote a friend: "laziness compels". I returned from my cruise yesterday, and spent most of the day in bed recovering. Anyway - this is the crucial, turning-point chapter. **

Chapter Five:

Stake Out

[Josh's P.O.V.

"Are you two really sure about this?" Lisa asked as we slid into Edward's sleek black car. The fastest in his personal armada, it was also the smallest; an admirable piece of machinery, and perfect for the task at hand.

"We're in a dark car, wearing dark clothing, sunglasses, and hats. We are unrecognizable, should we get caught - which won't happen." I assured her. Though Lisa didn't exactly relish her assumed leadership position, she fit perfectly into her role – with appropriate amounts of worrying and cautioning.

"Vampires are made to do this," Edward chimed in, lowering his sunglasses in a very Bond-esque move. "We're not going to give ourselves away to keep him from finding out too much."

Bella had relayed her conversation with Molly earlier that day. As long as my sister was in anguish, I was going to make sure that it wasn't all for naught – this was our first night staking out Nathan Lancaster. With vampire senses, we could see and hear exceptionally well – and Edward could hear even better. Molly planned to strike up a conversation with the boy via her handheld, feeling that it would be easier to shut him out of her life if she couldn't see his face. She was unaware of our meddling; much less of Bella's disclosing her inner conflict.

We rode to the Trapp residence in silence. The house was in the wealthiest section of town, close enough to the forest to give two vampires plenty of places to hide. We stopped the car at the entrance to a small park a mile away, and slid into the twilight.

"They aren't talking yet." I spoke – mainly to break the chilly silence, as we sat in a tree, only a hundred feet from Nathan's bedroom and hidden in the darkening sky.

"He's eating dinner right now." Edward confirmed. We hurriedly hid underneath the kitchen window, paying careful attention to the conversation.

_"More potatoes Natasha?"_ A high pitched voice asked. A bowl was put down; forks and knives scraped across plates.

"_No thank you__ Aunt Jan."_ A female voice answered. _"I'm full – you cook wonderfully."_

_"Thank you, dear." _The high pitched voice returned. _"What are you children's plans for the evening?"_

_"I have an essay due tomorrow that I'd like to proof read,"_ Natasha's quiet voice answered. Tony mumbled about a football game, Nathan claimed to be catching up with some old friends from "back home". I wondered briefly if he was intentionally lying – Edward confirmed my thoughts with a nod.

As the bodies moved their way up the stairs at a tediously slow human pace, we returned with vampire swiftness to our tree perch. It was completely dark now; I slipped the sunglasses into my pocket and pulled off the hat – irritating to wear, since it provided little heat to a vampire.

_"Nice."_ Nathan muttered from his console. I stopped my movements and focused on the screen – Molly had begun their conversation.

A few moments later, Edward growled in disgust, but kept his mouth firmly closed. I watched the screen – Molly explaining that she needed to focus more on chemistry class and would rather he no longer distract her. Her words were cool and focused – his responses confused. I shot Edward a quizzical look – he mouthed "later."

Fifteen minutes later, Tony sauntered into the room.

_"Did you call her__?"_ He asked.

_"__Naw__," _Nathan replied, gesturing to the screen, _"She doesn't want to talk to me anymore. It's was __like, really not like__ her."_

_"You're going to keep trying, though, right?_" Tony prodded. _"We __can't __lose__ any more money on this bet__."_

_"I'm going with a more romantic approach_." Nathan sat back in his desk chair, which creaked._ "__I'm going to __ask her to the homecoming dance__. Every girl wants a date__ And there's something about her – she terrifies me.__ I need a good challenge.__"_

_"Well man, it better work." _Tony said, plopping into a bean bag. _"This girl is tough to __crack – what with a brother as amazing as__ Joshua Johnson; her standards must be insanely high."_

_"I've been__the vision of perfection towards her," _Nathan said, opening a bag of chips. _"__Here__ Y__our mom needs to learn to cook."_

_"Seriously,"_ Tony agreed, scarfing down a handful of chips and speaking with his mouth full. _"__Nat's such a kiss up. Anyway, the game got rained on, so I'm bored__. Tell me about your plan."_

_"I'll do it the way I've always done – patented, my way is.__ Best I figure, I might as well have some fun, since I'm going to hell anyway.__"_ Nathan stood and closed the bedroom door. _"Woo them, get them alone, take what I need, and then get rid of the evidence."_

Edward tensed, as if ready to spring. I again asked him what was wrong, but he just shook his head. Nathan's words rang in my ears – what could possibly convince a boy of sixteen that is soul was no longer salvageable?

"_How did the 'rents never even have a clue?" _Tony wondered.

_"I left before things got out of hand_," Nathan admitted. _"Natasha figured it out –if she knows what's good for her, she'll keep quiet__."_

_"Brilliant man," _Tony spoke through yet another handful of chips, _"pure genius._"

_"I was thinking,_" Nathan scooted his chair closer to his cousin, _"about that Morgan girl – the one that flirts as if her life depends on it."_

_"Truly ironic,_" Tony laughed darkly, _"she wouldn't be doing that if her life did depend on it.__ If things with Molly Johnson fall through, we can still win that bet.__"_

_"Should I go for it?" _He asked.

_"My lips are sealed."_ His cousin replied.

We'd heard enough.

OOOOOOOOO

We sat in the car, staring at the empty park. If the young children that played here every day knew what monster lived only a mile away, they'd stay at home. This was sick.

"We certainly got more than we came for." I had said, as I slid into my seat.

"It's exactly what you think it is," Edward had replied, turning off the music and slumping in his seat; "The boy's a rapist and a murderer."

"And an exceptionally good actor." I had agreed. "He's after Molly."

We sat in silence for a while before I could no longer contain my quickly moving thoughts.

"I don't understand; even offenses as hideous as those are pardonable – why has he given up hope?"

"Not everyone has such as strong faith in God as you do Josh," Edward reminded me, "I'm surprised I hadn't heard any psychopathic tendencies until now – those images were so disgusting; so violent." Edward had shuddered.

_How do we tell her?_ I mused now. My sister – beautiful, innocent, talented – he could not kill her, but it was enough that he wanted to try.

"We don't." My companion answered my thoughts. "If she's as staunch as she says she is about keeping away from him, then we have no problems."

"That's not honest." I pointed out, but didn't disagree. "We at least tell Bella – Molly confides in her."

"And Lisa," Edward added, "She'll want to know."

I simply nodded as the car glided down the street. I knew that I would have to lie to my sister, but it was better that Molly be kept in the dark, especially if she had to sit next to the boy for the remainder of the semester. It was wrong, yes – but no one would be hurt as long as I was doing what was in my power to protect her. "I'm sorry," I whispered towards heaven. I wondered if God understood my conflicting desires – to follow him, and to protect my sister. I was ashamed at the side that won out.

OOOOOOOOOO

_"One may smile and smile and be a villain."_

_- Hamlet, Act 1, Scene 5, Line 115_

**Author's Note: I would love some reviews - are my chapters too short? I've been concerned about that. Also - a little challenge here: I have quotes at the end of every chapter, and you'll notice a trend (I only break it three times - for important reasons, but they don't count within the scope of this question) - can you tell me the significance of my sources for the quotes? It might take a few more chapters to figure it out.**


	6. Frailty

**Author'****s Note: ****I didn't like this chapter very much as I reread it; out of my own dissatisfaction, you are now getting Molly'****s ****history. I wanted to emphasize why she is so influenced by this human boy – why human opinions mean so much to her. **

**I'd also like to point out that she was born in 1923, and so is only a little younger than Edward (in the scope of the past two centuries of her existence). Josh was born in 1987 (he was bitten in early 2007), and Lisa was born in 2039, and bitten 22 years later.**

**Also, I saw Hairspray yesterday, and have joined the legions of teenage girls infatuated with ****Zac****Efron****. Just so you know.**

**Finally, I highly recommend reading ****C.McPherson's**** "Utopia, Not" – I'm thoroughly enjoying this highly original take on Bella and Edward's world. Without further ado:**

**A quick recap: **_"It's exactly what you think it is," Edward had replied, turning off the music and slumping in his seat; "The boy's a rapist and a murderer."_

Chapter Six:

Frailty

[Molly's P.O.V

"Are you alright Molly?" Nathan asked as I sat down, moments before the bell rang. I'd hoped to avoid a confrontation by just barely arriving in time for class. Thankfully, the teacher started the lecture, and I breathed a mental sigh of relief. I repeated my mantra; _if you avoid him, you can't hurt him. Pretty soon, he'll forget about you. If you avoid him, you can't hurt - ._

All was for naught though, when the teacher handed out a partner assignment, researching the pitfalls of crude oil and coal as energy sources, compared to the hydrogen and solar power we utilized today. I cringed when Nathan began talking.

"Molly, you seemed so cold last night, are you okay?" He asked. I ignored the question and instead decided, "We should split the work. I'll write the essay and draw the graphs if you do the research and work the equations." _And I'll fix your mistakes, _I added silently. If I was going to be antisocial, I might as well get a good grade from it.

"That sounds good," he nodded, "but Molly, seriously, what's going on? If you have a problem, let your friends help. And we are friends, right? I can help – be a good ear or a shoulder to cry on - whatever it is, I promise."

"You can help me get an 'A'," I told him, turning to the assignment description on the small screen of my handheld. "If you send me your work by Friday, I can finish the typed portion over the weekend for Monday's due date."

"Hang the assignment for now," he demanded, "There's something that you're not telling me – and it has to do with me or you wouldn't have asked me to ignore you. It would be nice to be clued in, if it's something I can fix."

"Do you have the programs you need on your handheld?" I asked, ignoring his tirade. "If not, I'll send them to you."

"I know this is more than just chemistry class," he looked me in the eye. I steeled myself against their effect. His blue irises reflected offense and a little panic – as if he genuinely worried, and wanted to be given the opportunity to make things right before I did something stupid. I braced myself, and then took his handheld from the desk to check for myself.

"You're not going to talk about it," he concluded. "Not with me."

"You're all set here," I said, picking up my stylus and making a note in the planner section of my handheld.

After class, I headed straight for English and took my seat, avoiding others by pretending to be engrossed in the novel. Before I'd idly flipped three pages, however, the book was yanked from my hands, and I came face-to-face with Tony Trapp.

"You're not talking to people anymore? You're too shy now?" He mocked. "If you're going to be a prude you can at least be nice about it. What has he done to you?"

"Nothing compared to you," I muttered as I watched him stalk out of the classroom. I knew that what little friendly reputation I'd salvaged for this semester was lost now – and my sanity was close to flying out the window.

I briefly let myself remember what it was to be angry; to be bent on revenge upon the world that had wronged me. I remembered hating the mother that had left me in a gutter – hating the orphanage that I had grown up in, ignored and abused. I remembered running through the streets of the dirty, dark town; desperate for respite, grasping for love. I remembered the harrowing moment where I had made the decision – and sold myself into prostitution. I remembered the sadistic gleam of my first customer's red eyes – and in that moment, I was more than willing to accept death.

I remembered waking up from hell to find that I had been given a life worse than death. In my rage, I enacted my own cruel and heartless revenge upon the world that had been so cruel and heartless to me. The humans I had been familiar with did not deserve to live – I felt no remorse. I found that my revenge was sweet – so sweet, and so addicting.

I remembered watching the people of a city I had been preying upon. I observed a happy family laughing over dinner; a kindly stranger helping an elderly man; and then I met another vampire, my own age. I was weary of the anger that had become my purpose – I was intrigued that the boy with the caramel eyes and the odd eating habits would take pity on such a disgusting creature as me.

I remembered the day that I had been introduced to the welcoming coven in Denali – I remembered the years I had spent with them, learning to control my rage, and my thirst. I remembered the day that Josh and Lisa and I had formed our own coven, wanting to live once more among the humans.

And now, eternity was bearable. I still could not trust the God that Josh trusted; my human life had left me embittered. Josh saw me as his fun loving kid sister – I had never told anyone else my story – save for the man that had shared his own story of rebellion with me, one-hundred and fifty years ago. My reverent brother would never imagine that the girl who now embraced her childhood had never had one in the first place.

I relied on my family for companionship – none of us had mates, but we were each other's support group and "boredom busters." We avoided isolation because we feared the mental breakdown, becoming the vampires of folk stories and Hollywood and mythological lore. Our life close to the humans kept us strong and entertained. The repetitive aspect of high school took its toll – to be seen as distant and proud only made it harder for Josh and me. We aimed for shy – we could converse with classmates but understood the transience of life and feared close relationships – it fit perfectly with our story. As I watched Tony Trapp's retreating form, I had to remind myself that he wasn't worth the distress of being a murderer.

I sighed; at least it would be my first time through high school being utterly hated.

OOOOOOOOO

I stood around the corner from the water fountain, gathering my wits and my thoughts before continuing to my next class. It had been a week since I'd told Nathan to leave me alone – and since he had grudgingly agreed. I sighed as I turned around; I knew who was standing behind me. Sneaky as he thought he was, Nathan Lancaster was no match for a vampire's sharp sense of smell.

"Hi Nathan," I caught him off guard with my cheery greeting.

He took a moment to collect himself before asking, somewhat bemused, "You're talking to me again?"

I acquiesced, "We're not in class right now. I saw you coming. I figured that you wanted something."

"Do you want to know what it is that I want?" He teased, but I saw a flicker of shock in his eyes.

"Get on with it," I waved my hand vaguely towards the end of the hall, keeping up my act. "I don't like being late."

"Will you accompany me to the homecoming dance?" He asked. Before I could reply with my decline at a human speed of speech, he added, "Just for the dance, and just as friends – you've made it pretty obvious that you're not into me."

I stopped to consider his proposal – maybe I could finally end this. He was a genuinely nice boy and we would have a fun night as normal teenagers. Once the dance was over he would have won; the chase that adolescent boys craved so much would be over. My semi-social behavior would disperse my reputation as distant and proud, and my overwhelming guilt would fade. If he thought there was something monstrous about me, he'd have run a long time ago. Unable to find any negative argument, I reconsidered my answer.

There was a silky dress from Dorian – the most revered designer in Paris at the moment - that I'd been admiring for a few weeks now. It was reminded me of tea-dresses popular during my youth – I loved the simple cut, the swishy fabric, but most of all, the color.

"I'll be wearing a green dress." I finally said. "So make sure you don't clash."

OOOOOOOOOO

_"Ambition should be made of sterner stuff."_

_- Julius Caesar, Act 3, Scene 2, Line 101_

**Author's**** Note:****Did ****you ****like ****this ****chapter? ****Does ****Molly's ****past ****make ****sense ****with ****her ****current ****character? ****You've ****figured ****out ****who**** "****converted****" ****Molly? ****Keep ****guessing**** as ****to ****the ****significance**** of ****the ****quotes (****the ****revelation**** in ****the ****last ****chapter ****would ****provide**** a ****pretty ****big ****hint)****. And, ****if ****you ****know ****the ****stories, ****they ****all**** share a ****common ****theme**** – and ****that ****was**** a HUGE ****hint.**


	7. Concern

**Author's Note: We return to Josh's own inner conflict. **

**A quick recap: **_"I'll be wearing a green dress." I finally said. "So make sure you don't clash."_

Chapter Seven:

Concern

[Josh's P.O.V.

_Oh, Molly, _I thought with a sigh, _what have you gotten yourself into?_ I was in over my head – no number of lies to my sister could protect her from the horrible truth about the boy, once she inevitably found out. Nathan Lancaster had a police record – a gang related history. Drugs, theft, the beating of an innocent man; I was surprised that a sixteen year old human could accomplish so much devastation in such a short amount of time. There was no firm evidence of his guilt in several local murders, but there were plenty of suspicions. Nathan Lancaster was on the run – it was quickly obvious that he had moved away from his old town to save face. In our town, there was more than enough money to cover up anything from a traffic violation to teenage drug rings; if he wanted to hide his past, the talkative soccer moms would look the other way.

I marveled at the irony for a moment. He was as human as they come, and as evil as a vampire. As vegetarian vampires, driven to goodness, we had committed fewer crimes than this boy. The irony - we chose this location so that we might hide easily, blend in easily, and leave easily. I deleted the search history and turned off my console, leaving my assistant editor in charge of finishing the day's work – I was going to be late to the store, yet again.

Edward's car was already in the mall's parking lot when I arrived. I locked up and hurried towards the department store – my shift began in two minutes and, for being a vampire, I had a horrible history of being late. As I jogged at a human pace, I plotted my entrance – hurry to the back of the store, and then walk onto the floor as if I had no worries in the world."Running late?" The manager, Mr. Beasley, raised his eyebrows as I effortlessly ran past. He put up a hand to stop me – it took all of my self-control not to bowl him over.

"In the girls department today," he instructed. I looked around the store – Edward was standing behind the cash register in the center of the room, looking more than a little smug.

I took a deep breath and prepared to dazzle my way out of punishment. "I'm sorry, Mr. Beasley," I smiled calmly, "I had responsibilities at school."

Mr. Beasley didn't fall for my more-than-just-good-guy charm. "Get to work on time in the future."

I ran my fingers through my messy hair as I moved, slower this time. I clipped on my I.D. tag and made my way to the front of the store, smirking at Edward – he would be relieved of teen ogling for one day, but tomorrow, I was beating him here. Silently, a competition had been initiated – and I was determined to rise victorious.

I folded clothes slowly, stacked them neatly, and tried my hardest not to look sexy while doing so. Still, I heard more than a few giggles when I bent over or moved past a group of girls. I thought angry thoughts whenever in the presence of my mind-reading friend, just to spite him.

We took our break at the same time, and I pulled him into the busy mall so that no one would overhear our conversation. The situation was more serious than we'd thought, and I didn't want to attract notice.

"The guy has done jail time." I spoke in a low murmur. "He's got gang-related convictions. Implications of past murders. I don't like this."

"What can we do?" Edward asked, steering me towards the food court, the noisiest section of the mall. "He hasn't done anything yet. I don't know how I'd explain to the police that I just 'saw it in his head'."

I pinched the bridge of my nose, though I didn't feel any pressure. "I will do whatever I can to protect Molly."

"She can protect herself," my friend reminded me, taking a seat in the far corner of the food court.

"She thinks he's practically perfect, as far as human boys go." I moaned.

"She's not falling for him, no matter how much she likes his eyes," Edward explained, "but she does worry that he may like her too much."

"We need to tell her," I said. "I owe her that consideration, at least. I can't keep lying – it feels all wrong. And stay out of other people's head – it's not polite."

Edward grumbled, holding his hands up in surrender. I knew what he was trying to tell me with his slightly raised eyebrow. _Saving Molly from trouble wouldn't absolve my guilt for what happened to Lydia and Sarah. _

I looked him in the eye. "I have the power to prevent it from happening again. I have the responsibility to prevent it from happening again."

Edward raised the other eyebrow now and looked across the food court. "You can break it to her, then."

I followed his gaze; Tony Trapp and Nathan Lancaster had just walked into the mall, followed by a group of fawning girls.

"They're headed into our store." He explained. We took off, too fast to be seen.

OOOOOOOOO

"Do you have this sweater in a smaller size?" A petite blonde looked up to me, batting her eyelashes. _Not in your lifetime, _I thought, but agreed to find the sweater in a smaller size. Edward chuckled as I walked past – I noticed his gaze following the two boys, who were watching the girls with hungry eyes. I felt bad for those girls, for the violent death that they might meet. I heard a low, vampire voice as I passed the cash register once more.

"You can't save them all," Edward reminded me as he handed a customer, impervious to our quiet exchange, their receipt. I nodded in acknowledgement as I handed the girl the smaller size, and then suggested a rack of jeans that would match the sweater well in style. The boys would follow, and Edward would be able to focus better on their thoughts through the loud music and the haze of other minds.

When our shift ended, Edward explained that Nathan was glad for the attentive entourage, but wasn't tempted enough to commit more crimes against humanity. Nonetheless, I drove home in silence, my thoughts too jumbled as I tried to decide how and when to tell Molly that her dear friend was a malicious murderer. I wanted to do the right thing – it had been so easy my whole life. The Bible was clear about what was right and what was wrong; I knew that I needed to love my sister, and with that love I would protect her. But, in loving her, I was lying to her. I'd never been faced with such a conundrum in one-hundred and nineteen years.

OOOOOOOOO

_"Murder most foul, as in the best it is,_

_But this most foul, strange, and unnatural."_

_- Hamlet, Act 1, Scene 5, Line 33-34._

**Author's Note: Comments are appreciated – what you did and didn't like, what confused you, what is keeping you reading, etc. **


	8. Trouble

**Author's Note: I realize that both last chapter and this chapter have very filler-like qualities, but I assure you that they are important. Here we have a moment between Molly and Lisa.**

**Also, here I begin posting two chapters a day – just so you know to watch for that – because I want to finish this by the time Eclipse comes out. I'll post the second chapter later today (so, if you're getting Story Alerts, you'll get two separate and know that there's two chapters to read). Starting with chapter ten, I won't post them separately.**

**A quick recap: **_I knew that I needed to love my sister, and with that love I would protect her. But, in loving her, I was lying to her. I'd never been faced with such a conundrum in one-hundred and nineteen years._

Chapter Eight:

Trouble

[Molly's P.O.V

"Not on your life!" Lisa, unwilling to hear me out, didn't even look up from her business text.

"Tell me why not." I demanded, just as determined that I would go as my sister was that I wouldn't.

"Do you want me to list the reasons?" She looked up at me, arms folded across her chest, leaning back slightly on her stool at the breakfast bar where she usually studied.

"Shoot." I folded my arms likewise and took a seat, not breaking my gaze from my sister.

Lisa sighed. "One, a human boy in close contact with a vampire all night will notice its cold skin. Two, a vampire in close contact with a human boy all night will have a hard time not eating him. Three – especially so because this boy has been known to irritate you. Do you need anymore?"

Her reasons were sound, but I knew that she was leaving something out. That feeling of being left out of the loop made me angry – it began to boil in my chest.

"What's wrong with wanting a night of teenage normalcy?" I begged, and then realized that wasn't the correct way to go about it. "Guys are all about the chase, right?"

Lisa nodded, so I continued. "Once he's finally gone out with me, he'll back off. I've seen it hundreds of times. Not to mention, should I go out into society, I will rectify the rather depressing anti-social reputation I've garnered, due in majority to the aforementioned vampire-ness."

"So you're willing to risk a boy's life over your own reputation? Is that what this is about?" Lisa looked stern now. "There is absolutely no way I'm letting you go if that's the case."

I felt a growl rumbling through my chest, an expression of my boiling anger, and didn't hesitate to let it out. "You're just annoyed because you don't have any friends! You're upset because there isn't a guy out there that likes you to the point of being annoying! You're sacrificing my happiness because of your own misery!"

"That's ridiculous!" Lisa's stood across from me, raging. "I'm the leader of this coven, and I make decisions based on what's best for everyone – including the humans! What's best for you is that you stay away from this boy, and that he stays away from you!"

"Do you think I haven't tried that?" I realized that I was in her face, but didn't stop my tirade. "Why can't we just go with the flow and let the chips fall where they may, for once, instead of being all prissy 'vampires-who-do-the-right-thing'? I'm not being ridiculous – you are!"

Lisa stood silent for a few minutes, calming herself down. I found myself holding onto the anger for all that I had – refusing to give in. The flow of enraged thoughts wouldn't stop; the amount that this family had given up, the way that she was always unreasonable, jealous, and now she was hiding something from me – I could see it in her troubled eyes; I couldn't stop.

"Maybe we should discuss this with everyone else, later, once we've both calmed down." She spoke slowly, trying not to incite more harsh words.

"Yeah, maybe we should," I barked, storming out of the house just as Josh and Edward were running in.

"Molly!" Josh turned to catch up with me, as if he had something important to say, but I blew him off, heading into the forest.

I let out my frustrations in a short hunt, finding that the flow of blood cooled my anger. As the sky darkened towards midnight, I made my way to a small brook, and sat on a rock at its edge. The gentle sound of water cleared my head, and I readied myself to think.

There was no doubt that I had insulted Lisa – she had sacrificed her own happiness on more than one occasion to make our lives easier. Her point was logical – I was putting this boy in more than just potential danger by being so close to him. I stared at my reflection in the water – had I always been this selfish? True – vampires are naturally selfish creatures – but it was unreasonable to indulge in my own wants. I was no longer giving into my rage – Lisa loved me, and wanted the best for me. We lived the way we did to keep from becoming murderers, and to keep hidden; I had singlehandedly jeopardized not just myself, but an entire supernatural world.

A part of me still fought though. Yes, Lisa was right, but I'd run out of ways to get Nathan off my back. Short of transferring to a new school where I would never see him again, I could come up with no other ideas. On top of it all, I couldn't shake the impression that my sister was hiding something from me.

A few hours later, I quietly made my way through the house, looking for Lisa, to apologize. She was sitting where I'd left her, in the kitchen, studying from her handheld.

"I'm sorry Lisa." I began, "I shouldn't have said the things that I did."

Lisa turned to me, and I knew that if she could cry, she would have. "You were right," I continued, "It's selfish of me to want to throw away so much over a boy I don't even like."

Lisa let out a nervous laugh, and gathered me into her arms. "You're forgiven."

"Thank you." I spoke softly.

"I talked to the others." She said, as I sat down to face her. "They're all going to go to homecoming with you."

"Wait – I'm going?" I was more than shocked.

"Yes." She nodded and turned the screen of the console towards me. "Now why don't I order you this dress?"

OOOOOOOOO

_"Double, double toil and trouble;_

_Fire burn, and cauldron bubble…_

_…By the pricking of my thumbs, _

_Something wicked this way comes._

_Open, locks,_

_Whoever knocks."_

_- Macbeth, Act 4, Scene 1, Lines 10-11, 44-47._

**Author's Note: Thoughts? Suggestions? Confusions? Leave a review, of this chapter (or any other, for that matter!) Also, another source for the quotes (so far: Hamlet, Julius Caesar, and Macbeth).**


	9. Homecoming

**Author's Note: Here we reach the 'action' chapter; the dance. Will Molly find out about Nathan's mal-intentions? Also: lots and lots of thanks to Simply Kiwi for recommending my story to your readers. **

**A quick recap: **_"I talked to the others." She __said,__ as I sat down to face her. "They're all going to go to homecoming with you."_

Chapter Nine:

Homecoming

[Josh's P.O.V

I wasn't much of a dancer as a human, and as a vampire I steered clear of nights dedicated to raging hormones. I was thus surprised to find that high school dances are very much what the movies portrayed them to be. Cheesy lights were strung from the basketball nets of the gym, a DJ played the popular music, girls dressed to the nines, and guys looked itchy in their clean shirts. More than a few freshmen looked just a little tipsy, and the students bodies gyrated far too close to one another, to music that was too garbled for even my vampire ears to hear. Catching my train of thought, Edward chuckled. "Good to know things haven't changed much in the past hundred years."

I was the only single member of our group, but I didn't feel odd. A vampire in the midst of a high school becomes fairly immune to feelings of isolation. My only purpose in coming tonight was to watch over Molly.

Lisa wasn't one for plots and plans, but when Bella suggested that we let Molly go to the dance, she'd acquiesced. Lisa had realized that our sister missed out, and that there was no other way to get Nathan to back off; we were left with few other options. Under the watchful eyes of three vampires, if Nathan so much as thought of putting a toe out of line (quite literally), we could make sure he regretted it in an instant.

I watched as Molly's black curls and shimmery green dress moved into the crowd with her date, and wondered how she was surviving – in such close contact with so many sweet smells – only heightened by the anticipation and nerves and sweat of the evening. My friends and I sat along the wall, as if talking, but really watching the gyrating crowd, observing each footfall and sweet nothing uttered by Molly's date. I knew that Edward was having a hard time singling out Nathan's thoughts, so I suggested that he and Bella move further into the swarm of teens.

"We should," Bella agreed, pulling her husband up by the hand. I sat and watched, happy that my best friends could enjoy themselves tonight.

After nearly another hour of sitting, and watching, Morgan Winters shuffled over to me. Her dress was too tight, - an attempt to look "promiscuous," I assumed - and her heels were too high; she was struggling to keep her balance. The effect was more comical than I'm sure she intended.

"Do you wanna dance?" She offered. Feeling slightly reckless for a moment, I nodded and moved with the girl into the fray, primarily to keep a closer eye on the boy dancing with my sister.

Two raucous numbers assaulted my sensitive ears before I excused myself, and returned to standing with the Cullens, watching the rest of the students enjoy themselves – or at least, according to Edward, pretend that they were.

"Seems pretty silly," Bella laughed as we watched. Edward frequently recalled that, as a human, she had been a walking disaster. That, paired with her anachronistic sense of propriety, probably didn't lend itself to frequent freak dancing. I hadn't known Bella during her clumsy time, but her family had assured me that it had been both amusing and petrifying to witness.

Edward was recounting one such prom, where his beloved Bella was in a walking cast, healing from an unfortunate incident involving a tracker and a ballet studio in Arizona, when he stiffened and turned to me. Nathan was talking to Molly, moving to the other edge of the floor. Even with superior hearing, I couldn't make out his words. We skirted quickly around to the other side of the room, trying not to attract notice to our speed and urgency; Molly began to look frantically for Edward, and I caught what Nathan was saying.

"It'll be fun – they say that there's a great view from the ridge, and it's so much quieter up there."

"So no one will hear you scream," Edward finished for him. Molly heard his quiet addition. I growled as my sister caught my eye, her fears confirmed.

"Excuse me," I made my way over to the couple and somewhat harshly took Molly's arm from the disgusting predator. "Bella isn't feeling very well, we're going home."

She nodded quietly, understanding my intent; still in shock from having been so horrendously deceived by that boy, she followed us quickly.

The car ride home was silent and fast. Edward turned off the spirited music we had listened to on the way there, and Bella sat in the back with the stunned Molly, holding her hand reassuringly. No one moved after the car was parked in front of our house. It was fifteen minutes later before Molly broke the silence.

"You knew," she uttered plainly. "And you didn't tell me."

By the time the rest of us had stepped out of the car, she was had disappeared into the hills.

OOOOOOOOO

_"It was, perhaps, one of those cases in which advice is good or bad only as the event decides." _

_- __Persuasion__, by Jane Austen._

**Author's**** Note: ****It's ****not ****long ****but ****what**** do ****you ****think? ****If ****you ****read ****it****, and ****have ****an ****opinion, ****leave**** a ****review**** – ****or ****just ****review ****to ****tell**** me ****that ****I'm ****the ****most ****wonderful ****person**** in ****the ****world, ****or ****that ****I'm**** terrible and ****deserve ****to ****be ****burned**** at ****stake.**

**And ****the ****quote ****is**** a ****deviation ****from**** Shakespeare-****ness, ****but ****it's ****horrendously ****relevant ****to ****the ****situation****, and ****it's ****Austen.**


	10. The Dagger

**A quick recap: **_"You knew," she uttered plainly. "And you didn't tell me."_

_By the time the rest of us had stepped out of the car, she was had disappeared into the hills._

Chapter Ten:

The Dagger

[Molly P.O.V

I was beyond angry – I was irate. Josh – my brother, my best friend – had lied to me. Joshua Johnson – the most loyal, honest creature to walk the earth – had lied to me. True, he lied about his identity daily, but this was on a different level – this was a betrayal. He who constantly spouted about God and integrity – he had become nothing more than a liar. Josh knew that Nathan wasn't who he said he was, but he didn't deem it necessary to warn his tormented sister that the human she was worrying her pretty little head over wasn't worth a moment of her endless time.

I knew that I wasn't exactly who I said I was either – but I did it to keep people safe. Nathan clearly had other, more sinister intentions. The anger in Josh's eyes when he pulled me from the dance floor would have made the most vicious of vampires hesitate. The disgust that plagued Edward's face when he turned to look back at the bewildered boy standing off to the side – Edward knew more than I had yet been told. Yes, Nathan wanted me to sleep with him, but Edward had seen other images in that twisted teenage mind.

Nathan had gotten me to trust him – I had let myself forget that humans were so capable of cruelty. Of course, he dared trust me – a vampire that could sooner kill him than kiss him. The situations were different! I couldn't keep rationalizing his actions – I accepted that I was a creature of the night, but Nathan Lancaster was purely a human of demented purpose.

I watched the water swirl around my feet – the hem of my beautiful dress was ruined, but I needed to be in the clear, clean water. I needed to be away from my deceptive family. Could I no longer trust anyone? Had I been living in a delusion for the past hundred and fifty years? Eventually, self would always win – how could I, for a moment, think that any creature that walked this earth was any less evil than those that had destroyed me? They were no less prone to a corrupted mind than I.

I took a deep breath of midnight air and tried to think rationally. It had taken so many years to convince myself of man's capacity to love. I had come to that conclusion through trial and error; in my long life, I should expect to come across some adversity. There was no reason to throw away more than a century's worth of work; there was no reason to succumb to my rage.

Josh was a man of God; he wouldn't do something he so adamantly avoided without reason. Edward had seen what was in Nathan's mind – if it truly was terrible enough to keep from me then I could not blame him either. Bella was my confidante – I trusted her because she never made rash decisions (knowing that once she made a decision, we were powerless to stop her). Lisa cared more than she would like to admit, and in agreeing to let me attend the dance, she had trusted the others' judgment in the situation. Neither my family nor friends deserved my hatred; just that ill-intentioned boy.

Now that I was calm, I stepped out of the churning water and hiked up my skirt to run home – only to crash into my brother's chest.

"Hi," I said, stepping back and looking up at his black eyes.

"I came to look for you."

"I see that." I smiled, showing him that he was forgiven. "You need to hunt soon."

"I know." He sighed, raking a hand through his messy curls. I noticed that he wore a ratty pair of jeans that I'd begged him to dispose of, and an old concert tee. He'd thought to change out of his nicer attire; I noticed him taking in my destroyed dress.

"I'm sorry," he said, sitting on the rock at the edge of the water. I sat by him, and leaned backwards to look up at the stars.

"You did what you thought was best," I said plainly.

"I was scared of telling you. I knew better." Josh admitted, looking up at the stars with me. "I thought that _I_ could protect you."

I laughed feebly. "I've been a teenager for nearly two-hundred years. I'm going to have to learn that not everything is bubbles and fairytales sooner or later."

"Edward wanted to kill him, right there, when we staked out his house. We've gone back, a few times – we never stay very long." Josh was barely whispering.

"Tell me, Josh," I said, sitting up and looking at my brother. "If I am going to sit next to him and avoid him for the next couple of months, I want a reason. I want to know why you, of all people, lied to me."

Josh winced at the severity of words, but pulled me up to walk with him. "He was a gang member. Convicted of juvenile crimes, but suspected in more than a couple of missing persons cases. The ones that turned up were raped, beaten and murdered."

"Is that why he's here?" I asked, finding myself scanning through the trees, though I would know immediately if something else was out there.

"It seems so," Josh said stopping for a moment. "We don't know why he does this – but you're not his only intended victim."

"Don't try to save the world Josh." I cautioned. Bella was right – Edward and Josh were far too alike. "God won't punish you for not being able to protect every at-risk individual you come across."

"You say that as if it were a joke," Josh stared me in the eye, daring me to say more.

"I'm sorry," I looked at the detailed forest floor. "'Because of the oppression of the weak and the groaning of the needy, I will now arise,' says the Lord. 'I will protect them from those who malign them.'"

"I didn't know that you'd even read the Bible," he smiled for the first time that night.

"I wanted to know why it meant so much to you," I explained. "That promise is certainly a good reason. I don't necessarily believe it, but you know what they say, 'he's got the whole world, in his hands'."

Josh laughed, playfully punching me on the arm. I didn't tell him why the verse had struck a chord with me – why I both hated it, and hoped that I was true. We raced home.

There were more than just three other vampires in the house. I stopped, smelt the wonderfully comforting scent on the air, and ran through the door.

"Molly!" A giant of a man pulled me into his arms, swung me around, and put me down, where I was bombarded by his polar opposite – a short, black-haired woman.

"Alice!" I yelped as she pulled me into a hug.

"It's been far too long," She said, moving back to look at my face. "You haven't aged a day!"

"I wonder why," Esme Cullen pushed her way over to pull me into another hug. "We've missed all of you so much."

Josh was being greeted in much of the same manner – rather exuberantly. I chuckled before I realized that Rosalie was behind me.

"No hug for me?" She teased as we embraced. I had missed this family – our closest friends, though we rarely saw them anymore.

"I hear that you got into a spot of trouble," Carlisle said a few minutes later. "Alice saw you all leaving the dance in a hurry, and given what Edward told us, we assumed the worst."

"I think I'm okay now," I assured him, thinking: _g__reat, I really was the only one out of the loop._

"Good," he said, "we like things that way."

As the group returned to chatting – Edward had filled them in on the situation from earlier that evening – Josh excused himself to hunt.

"So," Dr. Cullen called the room to attention, "we need to discuss what we're going to do about this issue, since you've all expressed your worry for the safety of the female population of the town."

Though I was momentarily glad that we all seemed to be on the same page – we knew about Nathan's crimes, we ought to hinder him – I couldn't help but feel a sense of foreboding as I watched my brother drive off towards the woods.

As if there was something out there, and he would come back a changed man.

OOOOOOOOO

_"Is this a dagger which I see before __me,_

_The handle toward my hand?"_

_- Macbeth, Act 2, Scene 1, Lines 44 - 45_

_Quote__ in __chapter__Psalm__ 12:5_

**Author's**** Note: ****This ****is ****one**** of my ****longest ****chapters ****thus ****far****! I ****want ****to ****hear ****what ****you ****think****. As ****you ****know****, I ****alternate ****the ****point**** of ****view ****each ****chapter****, so ****next ****chapter ****is**** a look at ****Josh's ****reaction.**


	11. Without Thinking

**Author's Note: Make sure you read Chapter Ten before you read this chapter, because I've posted both in the same day.**

**A quick recap:** _Though I was momentarily glad that we all seemed to be on the same page – we knew about Nathan's crimes, we ought to hinder him – I couldn't help but feel a sense of foreboding as I watched my brother drive off towards the woods._

_As if there was something out there, and he would come back a changed man._

Chapter Eleven

Without Thinking

[Josh's P.O.V.

As stupid as I felt for behaving the way I had, I also felt relieved that no further damage had been done. Molly was so innocent. I knew that as a vampire, she obviously knew that not all the world was good, but if I could keep her happy, keep her joyful, then I'd done what I could. None of us had mates; we relied on each other for company – for sanity.

I couldn't ignore that lying to my sister was wrong. Even worse, I didn't feel horrible about it. My faith may have been strong, but I was no less affected by temptation than anyone else. I thought that I had it down; I would sin, but I would feel remorse, ask for forgiveness, and resolve to do better next time. But now, without the remorse, I felt like my pleas for forgiveness were pointless.

I parked my car and surveyed the forest as I started to run. The best hunting spots were about seven miles inward, further uphill. I liked big cats – we had discovered, in my early days, that Edward and I couldn't hunt together – it ended in brawls, which Emmett always claimed were funny, but Bella said were just distasteful.

After a couple of minutes of running, I heard the distinct sound of an older, larger car. Most cars of this new century were small and quick, running on hydrogen or electricity. This was at least ten years old, and less efficient.

Against my better instincts, I moved towards the sound, wondering what could be in the woods at this time of night, what I needed to know to stay hidden.

The footsteps immediately ruled out any of my vampire family or friends. It was a male, about sixteen, 130 pounds, and reeking of cologne.

I hadn't noticed the smell of daisies until now – the wind was moving in the opposite direction. There was a shallow hole at the boy's feet – I almost feel the anger radiating from me. Nathan Lancaster was burying his latest victim; Morgan Winters, the girl I had danced with earlier that evening.

Now, utter rage boiled within me; it consumed me. I could barely see, and I had no idea that I was moving, what my body was doing.

My next conscious thoughts registered the dead boy in my grasp.

OOOOOOOOO

_What's done cannot be undone._

_- Macbeth, Act 5, Scene 1, Line 71_

**Author's Note: I think this scene speaks for itself – tell me about your reactions, what you think. Now that you've read this chapter, I ask again - what is the theme of all of the Shakespeare quotes I've used? **


	12. Quality Time

**Author's Note: ****"****Meanwhile, back at the ranch…****"**

**The response to the last chapter was overwhelming. I'm glad you like that little twist - I know, when I was plotting this out, I found it unexpected (but necessary) as well.**

**On a serious note: ****What's t****he link that ties the Shakespeare quotes together? The three plays are about murder: Macbeth, seeking power, becomes a murderer; Hamlet avenges his father's murder, meanwhile slaughtering a few innocent bystanders; and Julius Caesar is murdered by his friends. ****I said it was too easy. ****You all came up with some really good thoughts though, and some other connections I hadn't noticed! ****I particularly liked ****'s**** observations. ****(Now, there is one other****, silly, reason -**** but ****I'll explain ****that in the afterword).**

**A quick recap:** _Now, utter rage boiled within me; it consumed me. I could barely see, and I had no idea that I was moving, what my body was doing._

_My next conscious thoughts registered the dead boy in my grasp._

Chapter Twelve

Quality Time

[Molly's P.O.V.

"Tell us more," Lisa prodded Emmett to continue with his stories.

"So, we were spring cleaning, because, you know, our mother's crazy like that. Normally, we donate everything to a charitable cause, and we pick one as a group, every year. Well, this particular year – it must have been 2006 – we decided that our dear Bella would be our charitable cause."

"Which I resented!" Bella added from the armchair where she sat in Edward's lap.

"Of course you did," Jasper said, "and I had to suffer your resentment all day."

"I'm not going to apologize for that," Bella snapped.

"I'm the one telling the story here!" Emmett called into the verbal fray.

Esme took it upon herself to calm her children down. "Let Emmett continue, since there isn't much point in bringing up a century-old argument. You aren't savages. Behave."

"Anyway," Emmett cleared his throat and then continued, "some of those items – that Charlie did keep – we've recently discovered were left, upon his death, to Jacob Black's family. So, the only proof left in Forks, Washington of the Cullens' existence is in the hands of werewolves."

"Ironic," Lisa murmured approvingly as the rest of the room chuckled.

Bella was unusually quiet as the chatter began again, searching for a new, funny or ironic story to tell. Edward was giving Emmett a dark look – some element of the story had irked his wife, though I had no idea what.

After a while, Carlisle started reciting a tale about drag racing in Montana a few years ago. Supposedly, Jasper had wrecked one of Edward's faster cars, and had managed to damage Rosalie's in the process. I could only imagine the havoc that would cause amongst our car crazy friends.

After a while, Esme and Lisa started discussing the finer points of various cleaning products, and Bella and Edward filled Jasper in on a running debate with Josh about vampires and eternal punishment. Rather unfortunately for Edward, Jasper took Bella's side.

"A vampire can choose something better than killing – it's not that satisfying of a life. I know that – and look at how much better I've gotten since that time I nearly killed you, Bella! Granted, I will never have your control, or yours Edward, but I think Emmett and I are pretty well matched by now."

Bella took up the argument from where her brother left off, "So you see – our way of life is not doomed to failure! I mean – you, too, never killed me, and you had all of the motivation in the world."

I was more interested now, and moved towards the group. Bella had been Edward's singer – aside from Carlisle himself, Edward had been the strongest of the Cullens when he met Bella – and it took everything he had not to kill her on the spot.

"Killing is a relative term," Edward said, referring to Bella's non-beating heart.

"I'm not brain dead." She said, challenge in her voice. Jasper decided to change the subject.

"I'm not the only testimony to salvation in this room."

I sighed. I enjoyed listening to the debate, but was useless in when called upon to participate.

"Molly has done even better than I." Jasper continued.

"That doesn't mean it wasn't hard for me." I said. "It's still hard for me. You try going to a dance with a human date."

"I have," Edward said wryly.

"Does it count for anything if it's harder to resist human blood, since you've tasted it before?" Jasper mused, again steering us away from perilous waters.

"I would like to think so, but Josh likes to remind us that sin is sin, no matter to what degree. Any selfish intentions taint the purity of a person." I said, somewhat sadly. I had spent a few decades in Denali, learning to abstain from human blood – but I'd spent the same amount of time as a vicious vampire, desperate for revenge. "Feisty," Tanya had called me when we'd met, but in reality, I was angry and ruthless.

"I think maybe it's a greater accomplishment for those that have never fallen prey to bloodlust." Edward added. As successful as he was, he'd rebelled against Carlisle in the early years, angry that he couldn't taste the delicious human blood for himself.

I wondered, briefly, what had motivated the others. Jasper ran with another coven; herd mentality probably influenced his decisions. Edward didn't like Carlisle keeping him from his natural food source. Anyone else in the room that had tasted human blood had purely slipped up. Carlisle, Bella, and Josh had impeccable self-control – had never drained a person dry.

Sighing, I turned from the argument as I heard my brother's car approach, and the front door open. He moved quickly, as if to avoid the group in the living room, but Edward was quicker, pinning him down at the bottom of the stairs.

Joshua's eyes were stained a deep, blood red.

OOOOOOOOO

_"There is a special providence in the fall of a sparrow."_

_- Hamlet, Act 5, Scene 2, Lines 233-34._

**Author's**** Note: ****Reviews**** are more ****than ****welcomed.**

**On a less serious note: My sister and her friend were having a hair-dying party, and they convinced me to put a blue streak through my hair.**** Unfortunately, the blue dye came**** out like a blonde-gone-green-from-chlorine, ****because it had bleach in it, ****and they didn't have enough left to go over my streak a second time**** (like they'd done to my sister's friend)****. I need advice: should I just leave it as is – slightly ****green-ish – or redo it myself? **


	13. So Fair and Foul a Day

**Author's Note: The previous chapter was short, as is this one. This is particularly angsty – I had no reason (nor motivation) to try and drag it out. **

**I'm also posting "Spring Cleaning with the Volturi" today – so, if you were a fan of "Spring Cleaning with the Cullens," be sure to read it.**

**A quick recap: **_Joshua's eyes were stained a deep, blood red_.

Chapter Thirteen:

So Fair and Foul a Day

[Josh's P.O.V.

I hadn't even been thinking as I acted – I was so consumed by anger that I had become incapable of rationality. However, now, as I sat on the roof, looking out over the sleeping town – a town that feels so safe, away from murderers – I could remember each detail so clearly. The shock in his eyes, the fear and his sudden pallor; I could still feel the pumping of the blood from his heart, slowly decelerating until all life ceased. I did not think to crush the boy's skull or snap his neck – I could still hear his scream of agony in ringing in my ears. All the work of a moment – and then the deed was done.

Not one of my family members or friends came up to the roof. They had all fallen before – they were giving me the space that I needed. I couldn't bring myself to emotion yet, or I might have felt grateful for their consideration. I looked out over the town and watched as the rising sun made its way across the valley, in beautiful hues of blue.

"So fair and foul a day I have not seen." I spoke to myself as I watched the sunrise. I needed to move, to avoid exposure, but I was apathetic – I couldn't care less about our stupid secret anymore. Give me destruction – I was worth no better.

His death kept flashing before my eyes. The irony of the townspeople snuggled in bed, who thought that they were safe. The same people that refused to believe in monsters. I was a monster. The words meant nothing to me yet.

I recalled everything that I had done since that first day of school, suddenly feeling the weight – the reality of mortality. I was not bound by it, but these humans that I ignored – they dealt with it daily. I recalled Molly's attentions to the boy – if only she had chosen to ignore him that first day! All would be well.

But even monsters know not to live in the world of "if only." I could not blame my sister.

I recalled his words that plagued me for weeks, _"I'm going to hell anyway."_

For the first time in one-hundred years, I began to doubt. Was I, a vampire, doomed to hell? Back on my birthday, before Nathan Lancaster was even on the radar, Edward had pointed out that vampires had a very long time; it was inevitable that they would make mistakes. We were doomed to sin; were we all doomed to hell? What of forgiveness?

I had tasted human blood – and I knew, as I slid from the roof and into my dark room, that I would taste it again. I was a beast, a monster, a savage – was there no forgiveness?

I was numb, but emotion was seeping in, slowly, through all of the little mistakes I'd made, through all of the little doors I'd opened up. I wondered if, in that moment, my soul oozed out as my grief oozed in.

I understood now why Edward or Molly could be so irritated at my faith in God. What would a perfect Lord want to do with a monster – stained, tainted, no longer worthy for His service?

I could feel the shudders taking control of my worthless body. I could hear the dry sobs that I pushed out of my feeble throat. It was not enough to express my anguish. I yelled. It was still not enough; I fell into a frustrated silence, invisible tears filling the room as I drowned in my sorrow.

OOOOOOOOO

_"… I am cabined, cribbed, confined, bound in_

_To saucy doubts and fears."_

_- Macbeth, Act 3, Scene 4, Lines 26-27_

**Author's Note: Is this an adequate reaction for the character? What say ye? I was getting a little emotional reading it aloud to myself – what effect does this particular chapter have upon you?**


	14. Banshee

**Author's Note: Here it comes – the effect of Josh's mistake upon the rest of his family.**

**A quick recap: **_I wondered if, in that moment,__ my soul__ oozed out as my grief oozed in_.

Chapter Fourteen:

Banshee

[Molly's P.O.V.

It was so easy to become complacent. We were content where we lived – happy, even. We were a family; two sisters and a brother, who leaned upon each other for support - until the day that my brother came home, eyes red and face ashamed. A part of me wanted to run up those stairs and yell at him. How could he make us sacrifice our normal lives? How could he be so inconsiderate? What type of Christian was he anyway? Had he been living in delusion? He was a vampire. He knew better.

The other part of me wanted to run upstairs and hug him. I wanted to tell my brother that we would help him; that we knew what the thirst felt like; that we would support him. No matter how horrible he felt, we still loved him. After all, we each knew what it was to fall from grace.

It was this conflict that kept me from running up the stairs. Instead, I collapsed on the couch, burying my face in my hands, letting my hair fall, creating a barrier from the world around me. How was I supposed to react? What could I do to help?

I knew immediately who he had killed. I tried to feel an ounce of sadness over the death of a boy I had once called a friend, but I could muster none. In the short time that I had known of his crimes, I had already judged him – I had already condemned him to the worst of deaths. Death by vampire was almost too quick and easy for him – but no, I couldn't let myself think like that.

I listened to the movement around me. Carlisle had immediately run to assess the situation. Bella was trying to convince Edward to leave Josh alone for a little while – a vampire in anguish needed some time to mourn. Rosalie and Emmett stood awkwardly, being the least close to my brother. Jasper left to sit in the car, unable to handle the emotion swirling throughout the house. Alice came to sit by me, her eyes closed and her fingers pressed into her forehead as she searched the near future. Esme and Lisa reacted as they always did, slipping into "do something" mode, ever the organized ones.

"I suppose we need to get ready to move," Lisa first spoke, addressing the members of the room.

"Where?" I murmured to myself. We were in no way prepared for a quick disappearance. I noticed Bella sifting through maps on the wallboard.

"Scotland gets very dark at this time of year." She began. "And it rains plenty during the summer."

Lisa nodded her agreement. "That's good. We haven't been there yet."

"It's very nice," Rosalie commented, probably feeling helpless to add anything else to the conversation. Her husband was still processing the information.

"Wait a second – do we even know who the victim was? Where it happened? Shouldn't we be covering our tracks first?"

"Nathan Lancaster," I heard myself reply robotically. Maybe I felt more sadness for the foul homicidal maniac than I'd realized.

Jasper walked back in then. "Josh just left for the woods. We'd better hope that Carlisle crosses him before he does something stupid."

"He's not going to do anything stupid." Alice countered from her place next to me.

"You didn't see this coming either though," Esme reminded her – not sternly, but simply as a concerned mother.

"If it was Nathan, then we can assume that there was really no decision making involved." Edward spoke slowly, understanding Josh's character the best, "He was remembering the scene – he had watched the boy bury that Morgan girl. I think any of us, knowing what we do, would have reacted the same way. He's sure to be thinking rationally now – I'd be betting on Alice."

I wanted to change the topic – I couldn't forbear another moment of speculation.

"What's our excuse," I asked, "for leaving? The town thinks that we have no other family. We have no plausible reason to leave."

We all retained our poses in silence for a few minutes, until Bella suddenly stuttered out, "A great uncle you didn't know you had just died. He left his fortune to his only relatives."

Lisa tilted her head to the side, but Emmett grinned. Bella always came up with the most perfectly outlandish ways to make things work.

She began to explain. "You have very few ties to the town. Quit your jobs, drop out of school – take your records, and skip town."

"The house?" Lisa wondered, sitting on the arm of the couch. "It's proof of our existence."

"I could sell it." Esme volunteered. "You bought it from us – we can cover for you."

"I like it." I said, sitting back in my seat for the first time. There was nothing comfortable about this conversation, but yet this was where the Cullens were at their element.

"We'll leave over the weekend." Lisa decided.

"Stay with us until you find a place," Esme suggested. Lisa tried to protest, but Esme's hospitality always won.

Emmett disappeared to rent a truck to move all of our belongings. It was nearly light, so Lisa washed up and changed to withdraw from her college. Jasper set about locating passports, I.D.'s, and the other pieces of forged information we would need. Edward helped Esme begin packing – sifting through our belongings to find the few things that would actually travel with us to Scotland. Bella stood outside with her handheld, relaying the new development to Carlisle and warning him to look out for Josh.

I felt hands tugging at my hair, and looked up to find Rosalie braiding my mess of curls into cornrows.

"Hi," I laughed, leaning my head back to make her job easier.

"Jasper seems to be having too easy of a time locating your documents." Alice reported from next to me, also picking up a few locks of my hair.

"Exciting," I sighed, letting Rosalie continue to play with my hair.

"Oh, yes, you're very excited." Jasper commented sarcastically. I tried, for his sake, to cheer up a bit. A new life was always exciting, and Scotland was historically known for vampires.

Edward entered the room. "Molly the banshee – I can see it now."

"Stop it." His sisters ordered at the same moment, though for different reasons; Rosalie protecting my thoughts, Alice protecting my on-edge emotions.

"Actually, in Old Scottish, it's 'bean nighe.' The banshee is Irish." Jasper commented, having ended his previous conversation.

"Jasper, exactly how large _is_ your internal dictionary of dead languages?" Rosalie scoffed.

"Well, screaming outside a house as an occupant dies isn't exactly keeping us hidden, regardless of the language." I said dully, unable to muster any enthusiasm for the topic, just extraneous details from exceptionally boring history classes.

I was grateful to them for trying to lighten the mood, but I no longer felt like half-hearted jokes.

"I'm going to bed." I decided as I moved from the couch, pulling my half-braided hair from Rosalie and Alice's hands. It didn't even register in my mind that I hadn't slept in one-hundred and eighty four years.

OOOOOOOOO

_"I 'gin to be __aweary__ of the sun_

_And wish __th__' estate o' __th__' world were now undone."_

_- Macbeth, Act 5, Scene 5, Lines 55-56_

**Author's**** Note: ****Reviews**** are ****nice! ****We ****only ****have**** a ****few ****chapters ****left****. I ****want ****to ****know: ****I'm ****considering ****writing ****the ****sequel ****to ****this****, in ****Lisa's ****point**** of ****view****. I ****want ****to ****be ****able ****to ****develop ****her ****character**** and show more of ****her ****relationship to****her ****family****, plus ****I'm ****going ****to ****give ****her**** a ****nice ****troublesome ****love-interest. ****Does ****this**** appeal ****to ****anyone? ****Secondly ****C.McPherson**** has ****been ****rather ****insistent ****that**** I ****write ****some**** of ****Nathan's ****point**** of ****view**** – ****what**** do ****you ****think**** of me ****adding**** a ****scene ****from ****Nathan's ****perspective****, as a bit of a "****special ****feature,****" ****to ****the ****end? ****It ****will ****probably ****take**** me a ****while ****to ****actually ****write, ****but ****it ****does ****interest me. ****Finally****, in ****the ****much**** more ****distant ****future, ****what ****about ****Molly's ****story ****until ****this ****point? ****I've ****loved ****writing from ****her ****point**** of ****view.**


	15. Purpose

**Author's Note: It was interesting writing this chapter, since it's a challenge writing any one-on-one with Carlisle. I hope I did him justice.**

**A quick recap: **_"I'm going to bed." I decided as I moved from the couch, pulling my half-braided hair from Rosalie and Alice's hands. It didn't even register in my mind that I hadn't slept in one-hundred and eighty four years._

Chapter Fifteen:

Purpose

[Josh's P.O.V.

"Josh!" Carlisle called to me as I ran through the woods. I ignored him. It was rude, but forced to confront another, I would be far more caustic. Normal Josh was no longer responsible for the words that would come out of my mouth; Murderer Josh had taken over.

"Josh!" Carlisle was following me now; I could hear his swift footsteps crunching through the forest. I was not a fast runner – he would catch up to me, and I would be forced to see the face of the man that defined a vampire lifestyle. I would be forced to receive his forgiveness, to hear his calming voice, to be encouraged, to see hope. I wanted to wallow in my failure.

"What?" I whirled around, my pursuer almost crashing into me.

"We need to talk."

"Do we now?" I was in no mood.

"Shall we walk?" He offered.

"Let's not," I barked. This was unfair treatment towards someone worth a lot of respect, but Carlisle took it in stride.

"Joshua," he began, "I just want to remind you that we all know how you feel. We want to help you, to be there for you."

"Sure," I remarked. As nicely as his warm-fuzzy speech would go over with the others, I wanted nothing more than hatred and censure from the world; I deserved no better.

"Josh," he sounded exasperated, "I know what you're going through. And I know that it's going to be hard -"

"Do you really?" I thundered, unable to hold my irritation in much longer. "Have _you_ ever killed an innocent?"

"Josh," Carlisle's voice was low, reprimanding – he wasn't going to take my outbursts. I ignored him.

"You haven't! You're lauded as the vampire with the strongest self-control in the world! How can you, even for a moment, claim to understand what I'm going through? Talk about self-control – I didn't even think before I acted. So, how do you know what it's like to become a murderer?"

Carlisle stood silently, his eyes showing no emotion. He was staring me down – wearing me down. I knew that my arguments held no sway – the thirst was the same for each vampire, regardless of feeding habits. Carlisle had endured censure and ostracizing for his choices. He had continually battled with the creation of his family – did he have any right to doom them to an eternity of darkness? He was open about his history, yet I needed an enemy.

"For the past one-hundred years, I had a purpose." I yelled. "I thought that I knew what I was here for! I didn't have a clue. I'm just the proverbial wolf in sheep's clothing – a monster walking around pretending to be the nice guy. You – you – you're a doctor! You save lives, you help people – you are an advocate for everything good. There is an entire group of vampires named for you! What am I? I am worthless. There is nothing good about me."

"Your greatest attribute is your faith in God." He spoke calmly, assuming control of the situation. "There is a lot of good about you."

"Why would God want anything to do with me," I spat, "when I have so blatantly thrown everything in his face?"

We stood in silence, each gathering our thoughts. I wondered what Carlisle thought he could possibly say to calm me – how could he prove me wrong?

"This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins." Carlisle quoted.

"That's from Matthew," I whispered. "One of my favorites."

"And how often have you debated with Edward that God offers forgiveness?" He looked me in the eye. I broke his gaze – I couldn't look at his honest eyes.

"I'm only beginning to grasp how he feels." I admitted. Edward had as much success in this lifestyle as Carlisle – despite a few years of bad choices. If I felt doomed to hell for one murder, not of an undeserving innocent, how did Edward view his eternity? Though I knew that sin was not counted in tallies and amounts – one was just as bad as ten - I disregarded that forgiveness was similarly innumerable.

"Don't think for a moment that we haven't all made mistakes before – myself included." Carlisle said. "As long as you believe in God, he will grant you forgiveness. You know that."

I simply nodded, hearing his words but not letting them sink in.

"Let it take it's time – mourn, be angry, scream or yell – but don't for a minute think that God wants nothing to do with you." Carlisle concluded, seeing that we would have no concord tonight.

I mumbled my acquiescence, and watched as Carlisle disappeared into the night.

OOOOOOOOO

_"Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow_

_Creeps in this petty pace from day to day_

_To the last syllable of recorded time,_

_And all our yesterdays have lighted fools_

_The way to dusty death.__ Out, out, brief candle!_

_Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player_

_That struts and frets his hour upon the stage_

_And then is heard no more. It is a tale _

_Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,_

_Signifying nothing."_

_- Macbeth, Act 5, Scene 5, Lines 22 – 31_

**Author's**** Note: I ****memorized ****this ****chapter's ****quote ****for**** my ****sophomore ****English ****class****, and I ****knew ****that ****it ****would ****be ****perfect ****for ****this ****chapter****. As ****aforementioned (****many**** a time), I ****want ****to ****hear ****what ****you ****think. ****Did**** I do Carlisle ****justice? ****What**** do ****you ****think**** of ****the ****way ****Josh ****is ****handling ****things?**

**Again, I want to know how you feel about the sequels I mentioned last chapter - not everyone answered my question - would you read them?**


	16. Isolation

**Author's Note: Some time has lapsed between this chapter and the last.**

**A quick recap: **_"Let it take it's time – mourn, be angry, scream or yell – but don't for a minute think that God wants nothing to do with you." Carlisle concluded, seeing that we would have no concord tonight._

_I mumbled my acquiescence, and watched as Carlisle disappeared into the night._

Chapter Sixteen

Isolation

[Molly's P.O.V.

I watched the rain fall in sheets as the train pulled into to the station. "Welcome to Aberdeen." I wondered what here would make a group of vampires feel welcome – I could think of nothing.

It felt like exile. Worse, I felt like it was my fault for befriending a human. As we waited outside the station, I wondered what the catalyst had been. I realized that at any moment, I could have changed my actions.

Yet, if Nathan were still alive, girls would still be dying, the town would not be safe. It was his life, in exchange for the happier lives of those who deserved it. I had forgiven my brother long ago, but I was still struggling to forgive myself.

A small green car pulled up in front of us, Edward Cullen in the driver's seat. He accompanied us north, having promised to teach Lisa how to drive a manual, and on a different side of the road. The Cullens had immigrated with us – they were ready to move again. Carlisle was working in Sick Children's in the Royal Infirmary in Edinburgh, commuting from their old farmhouse outside the village of West Calder. Esme was having fun renovating the centuries-old building. She loved Europe.

We piled into the car, as Edward drove us out towards our new home. Esme had found us a house and renovated it a month ago. Since then, our lives had been so full of activity; between packing and organizing and house-hunting, I'd barely had a moment to think.

Josh was still sullen, his expression somber, his tall stature slumped. We had spent two weeks with the Cullens, and he had made no visible effort to cheer up. I recalled a Saturday night, a week ago, when Alice, Rosalie, and I had taken it upon ourselves to do something.

_"All I need's another day, where I can't seem to get away, from the many things that get me down – yeah." I resisted the urged to giggle – we were doing this for my brother._

_"I'm sure you've had a day like me, where nothing seems to set you free…" Josh's face didn't change. He didn't even acknowledge that we were in the room._

_"I get down, and he lifts me up," I sang, Rosalie and Alice harmonizing the "Nah, nah, nah." Josh had once mentioned that Audio Adrenaline had broken up the year he became a vampire, which he had considered a sad omen. We had decided to perform one of their greatest hits for him. I had never been a fan of Christian music, but even I would admit that the song was catchy._

_Even with__ the hand motions, our effort had failed._

We stepped out of the car and into mud, each of us towing a duffel bag and trudging to the front door.

The cottage was in no way grandiose – it was cozy, much more our style. Esme had explained that the old houses in Britain hadn't changed much with the times – while the insides were full of modern appliances, the framework of the house itself would often be centuries old. _How appropriate,_ I thought as I made my way to my room, recalling the stone bricks on the outside and the giant iron knocker on the big wooden front door.

My room faced the back of the house, out onto a field, with some woods behind it. It was picturesque – if the weather was ever dry, I would love to walk through it, to photograph or paint the majestically wet scenery.

I peeked into Lisa's room – simple and minimal, the way she liked it. I noticed Josh's room across the landing – it was more like a library than anything else – filled with priceless copies of his favorite books. The Cullens loved to spoil us all. He sat in a large leather armchair, reading his Bible. It seemed like all he ever made an effort to do these days.

_"What are you reading?" I had asked, noting that he was, once again, reading his Bible. _

_"The Old Testament," He said, offering no explanation._

_"Which part?" I'd pried. I wanted to have a genuine conversation with Josh again – I missed his wit, his silliness. I missed his offhand __side __commen__ts that he didn't really take notice of__ – the ones that made me feel insuperior to his faith._

_"Job," He said__, his voice monotone and sharp_

_"I bet you're feeling a lot like him right now," I'd tried once more for conversation. "No matter how much you go through, you're never going to deny your God."_

_"I feel nothing like him," Josh had replied. "Job did not suffer because of his own sin."_

_I'd left the room, defeated, and disappointed in my brother._

"Are we going to name the car?" Lisa asked later as we sat around the kitchen table, playing card games.

Josh just grunted. He'd always named our cars – one of those silly things that made him uniquely 'Josh'. I missed those traits – the tree-climbing, prank-pulling, sister-teasing side of Josh.

"Once the rain stops, I'll take you out driving." Edward changed the topic, addressing my older sister. "You can't get your license here until seventeen, so in keeping with your story; you will be the only one able to drive."

Normally, Josh would protest about not being allowed to drive – he liked to get away, and would surely want to soak in as much of the Scottish highlands as he could. With his book fetish and my historical addiction, if my brother was not so out of spirits, we would have a lot of fun, touring aging attractions and learning about the lives of such an ancient people. We had moved to a country laden with castles, lakes, fishing villages; many historically celebrated authors resided in Scotland's hills, and golf made it's home here too.

Lisa asked Edward some questions about other laws in the U.K., and Josh began to quietly gather the cards. I stood at a window, watching the rain. It fell in sheets, raucous and roaring – it sounded like a stampede upon the old house.

I didn't hear Josh come up behind me, until he quoted, "There was no possibility of taking a walk that day."

He had once told me that, no matter how much students liked to make fun of it, the first sentence of _Jane Eyre_ conveyed all of the despair and anguish of the character. In that first sentence, it conveyed the life-influencing power of the weather – a winter where the "wind had brought with it clouds so somber, and a rain so penetrating…" The depressing situation of Jane's childhood is echoed in the forlorn state of the countryside. That simple allusion brought back so many memories.

"Exactly," I smiled. Maybe this new place would be good for him, after all.

OOOOOOOOO

_"I could not answer the ceaseless inward question – _why _I thus suffered; now, at the distance of – I will not say how many years – I see it clearly."_

_- Jane Eyre, by Charlotte Bronte_

_Lyrics to "Get Down" by Audio Adrenaline_

**Author's Note: This chapter is an outside look at Josh's melancholy – what do you think? Good? Bad? **


	17. Break Down

**Author's Note: This is the final chapter, before the epilogue.**

**A quick recap: **_I missed those traits – the tree-climbing, prank-pulling, sister-teasing side of Josh__… __Maybe this new place would be good for him, after all_.

Chapter Seventeen

Break Down

[Josh's P.O.V.

If the slightly off-key singing and dancing wasn't hint enough, Molly's unusually morose mood tipped me off. I watched from my window as Edward and Lisa returned from yet another driving lesson. Catching my strain, Edward came into my room and closed the door behind him.

"They're worrying about you."

I turned from the window and looked at my friend. He looked more haggard than usual, as if being around such a depressed being had become contagious.

_I kept thinking of that night – what I'd seen in that monster's eyes. The danger, the hatred in their deep red. I wanted so desperately t__o protect Sarah__ from his threatening scowl. No one should be subject to such fear – such cruelty in a single, sinister smile. _

_I recognized the fear in Nathan's eyes – it was the fear I'd seen in Sarah's eyes, all of those years ago. The surprise, the fear, the effect of the sudden knowledge that your life was far shorter than you'd anticipated. I'd once seen my own fear reflected in the scowling red eyes of a monster._

_I had become that monster._

"Why don't you go out for a walk?" Edward suggested. "It's not raining right now – the countryside is beautiful. Soon, it will be covered in snow."

It would be refreshing to leave the house, but I wondered if, wherever I stepped, death would follow. Would I be the destruction of such a beautiful location? However, Edward would not take no for an answer, and pressed me to experience the fresh atmosphere.

I nodded and left the room.

The air was crisp and clean from the rain. The grass squelched under my feet, but I paid no heed to the destruction of my expensive jeans. I thought about my family as I walked. Molly would love to paint out here – I wondered if she had yet; the rain had hardly stopped since we'd arrived. Lisa was loving learning to drive – with her technical mind; she caught on very quickly to the mechanics of a manual car, and was probably enjoying touring the countryside. Sadly, I'd been so disconnected from my family that I had no idea what was truly going on in their lives.

I sat on an old crumbling wall, a mile away from the cottage. The pile of stones was older than I was – it was comforting notion. I took a moment to look around – the long grass of the meadow I had just passed through, the darkness of the woods not even a mile away. I leaned back a little and raised my face to the sunlight.

There was so much sky here.

_"Sky!" Lydia giggled. "Blue!"_

_"Yes it is," Our mother had laughed as we watched my baby sister toddle over the grass in the park._

_It was my favorite memory of my young sister. It was the scene running through my mind on the day of her funeral – a bright, summer day, with plenty of __sunshine and __sky overhead.__ It was a beautiful tribute to my sister's joyful, albeit short, life._

_For me, still just a boy, the sky felt__ too open – God __could observe__ every minute happening upon the earth. I'__d wanted to hide from it, but there was nowhere to provide shelter from God's watchful eyes. _

All of a sudden, I was angry. I didn't deserve this beautiful place – why was I here? I didn't deserve any of my sisters, those whom I'd lost or those who tried so hard to help me.

"Are you intent on antagonizing me?" I screamed into the air. A flock of birds hurried from the woods behind me.

I heard no reply.

"Why are you doing this?" I jumped off the wall, still needing to scream.

I needed to be honest. I knew where my flaws lay and I'd refused to recognize them – flagellating myself for something that I knew would come along eventually. I held myself too responsible for things beyond my command – I was going to lose control if I allowed myself to become upset.

The events of that night had happened, and I had been powerless to stop them. I fell to my knees, wanting nothing more than to cry.

"Why did you let it happen to me? Why did you let me do it? What type of a God are you?" I was sobbing. I felt broken, spent.

It began to rain again. Pouring, pelting rain from the heavens – it felt like God was trying to clean away the horrible stench of a vampire – of a disgusting man worth very little any more.

_Lydia. _

_Sarah. _

_Nathan…_

_Molly. Lisa._

"Forgive me." I whispered into the ground, my hair sticking to the sides of my face. My clothes and shoes were ruined. I was soaked through, but didn't notice my discomfort. I felt all of the pent-up emotion falling from me – like Pilgrim's burden.

_Let me be strong for them; for Molly and Lisa. Protect them Lord. I cannot do it alone. I trust you now._

And then the rain stopped.

OOOOOOOOO

_"Angels are bright still,_

_Though the brightest fell."_

_- Macbeth, Act 4, Scene 1, line 94_

**Author's Note: As we draw to a close, any final thoughts? **


	18. Epilogue and Afterword

**Author's Note: My dear readers, we have reached it! The end of this adventure – and the epilogue.**

**Firstly, I would like to, once again****, thank leiahlaloa for all of you****r help. It was greatly appreciated.**

**On a side note (and as a nod to my editor, who is a fan) – David Crowder Band is a very popular Christian worship band, from when Josh would have been human (ac****tually, the person that I took much of**** Josh ****from ****is a HUGE Crowder fan). You don't have to enjoy his music, but I highly recommend looking at the link for David Crowder Band on my profile – he has amazing hair.**

**Secondly, I want to thank all of my readers. I hope I kept you entertained in the mad wait before Eclipse comes out.**

**Thirdly, I want to thank my reviewers. You keep me encouraged, and give great, honest feedback.**

**Finally, I have written**** an afterword at the end. Just some rambling stuff about how awesome it was to write this story.**

Epilogue:

Christmas

[Molly's P.O.V.

Josh always told me that I reminded him of a little kid at Christmastime. I was always so excited, dragging my brother and sister into the sitting room. We were a family of tradition – dressed in comfy pajamas, we'd sit around the tree and open our presents one by one. Lisa liked to have Christmas hymns playing in the background. Josh always managed to browbeat us into attending a church service.

"Do you want open your presents first?" He teased as I plopped down on the floor.

"Hey!" I swatted him, "I'm not a kid anymore!"

Josh shook his head, smirking, as if to say "that's what you think." Lisa reached for the first package in the pile beneath the tree. "This one's for you."

"It's from Edward." He said, looking at the tag stuck next to the bow on the shiny red paper.

"Aw, Edward wraps so prettily." Lisa teased as she began to dole out the packages, apparently desperate for a little more organization.

Josh was silent for a long moment. I looked at the unwrapped paper on his lap. "What is it?"

"It's a book." He said, holding it up.

"By who?" Lisa interrogated, collected his discarded wrapping paper for recycling.

Josh read from the cover. "'_Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die (or the eschatology of bluegrass)_', by David Crowder and Mike Hogan. It's autographed."

"Wow," I gasped. "I wonder where he found it."

Edward had managed to locate an autographed, mint-condition copy of a book that had only been available in limited supply when it was first published – when Josh was human.

"I think it's his way of saying sorry," Josh explained, reading the note Edward had left inside.

I peered over his shoulder:

_Josh – _

_I know that you love Crowder. The title, I find somewhat ironic, given that we're vampires. And given that the book is a discourse on the soul. I must admit, I read it before wrapping it up – good food for thought. Merry Christmas._

_Edward_

_P.S. Jasper has called dibs once you're done._

"Molly, open one."

Startled back to the dizzying array of Christmas gifts scattered through the room, I reached for a neat, silvery package. The card read "From Esme Cullen" in a simple print, and I ripped apart the paper to find a silky green dress – the same one I had worn to the homecoming dance. I was flawless now – Esme had repaired it to a state better than when I had purchased it.

"I'm so wearing this today!" I squealed in joy. The dress was too pretty for me to relate it to unpleasant memories, and green was always in season for Christmas.

"Wear a jacket!" Lisa reminded me as I hurried upstairs to steam out the crinkles in the fabric. I shouted back my okay, though I hated to cover up such a pretty item. However, Josh would hate for me to be even slightly immodest during a church service, and Lisa would hate for someone to notice that I didn't feel the cold.

We finished unwrapping gifts, "ooh"-ing and "aah"-ing at all of the appropriate moments. We continued with the joking and the teasing, until Josh reminded us that we needed to get ready to drive into town to the ancient church – in Scotland, fondly called "the auld kirk".

_"Sing choirs of angels, sing in exaltation…"_

Sitting in a back row, watching my brother singing hymns and smiling – a real, genuine, life-in-the-eyes smile, as he reflected upon the imagery - I realized that he'd accepted God's forgiveness.

_"Sing all ye citizens of heaven above…"_

He was whole again; he was Josh again.

_"Glory to God, in the highest…"_

I wouldn't have it any other way.

_"O come let us adore him,_

_"O come let us adore him,_

_"O come let us adore him, Christ the Lord."_

OOOOOOOOO

_"There's a divinity that shapes our ends."_

_- Hamlet, Act 5, Scene 2, Line 11_

_Lyrics from "O Come, All Ye Faithful" – __I picked __my favorite verse. _

**Afterword: **

This story came to me from an image in my head – just three teens hanging at the mall; two girls and one boy. That boy became the character of Josh, but the two girls changed a lot, and there is no scene with three random vampires trying to fit in at a mall (maybe in the sequel?).

I wrote this in the midst of writing "Spring Cleaning with the Cullens" – a humorous break from my previous piece, while I attempted to finish this story before actually publishing it. The desired effect was that I would be able to fine-tune my writing and editing, writing in one fell swoop instead of installments, producing more continuity, and hopefully whittling away until the only criticism it deserved regarded true faults in my writing, rather than petty errors or careless editing. It also meant fewer sporadic updates (of course, I went on a cruise in the middle of posting, but aside from that, it worked).

Anyway, the majority of this story was written on my shiny new laptop, named Sophia. The idea for the quotes didn't come to me right away – at one point I was struggling with Molly's inner conflict (before I'd even begun to expound on Josh's own turmoil), and had written diary entries at the end of her chapters. I felt that since Josh liked to write, he'd be likely to quote famous works. My best friend, an excellent writer that critiqued a very earliest draft of the first few chapters, liked the suspense that they added – how they managed to both sum up the chapter and foreshadow the next - so I ditched the diary entries (which didn't work anyway). I used Shakespeare for a few reasons – primarily because the Folger editions have quote references in the back, secondarily because the three that I chose (Hamlet, Macbeth, and Julius Caesar) are about murder, and finally because I'm a Shakespeare nut. Of course, I love Austen and Bronte more than I love Shakespeare, so they slipped in there as well: in chapter nine, after the one where I quote the witches from Macbeth (does anyone not love those witches?) and in sixteen, at the end.

Originally, this was all about Josh. Molly wrote herself – after I came up with a plot, I realized that I'd need some of her point of view. As I finished writing chapter two, I realized that I'd spent absolutely pages going on in her voice, and loved it too much to cut it very short. I have a much better grasp of Molly's character (though Josh's character biography was the easiest to write by far). Lisa isn't as well developed as I would have liked, but should I write the sequel, she will have a much larger role.

While I'm on this tangent, I will explain why I deviated from the typical Cullen-story. Having written a story based almost entirely on the original characters (and the few extra I threw in there were entirely flat) and driven by plot, I began this one with just characters (specifically, as I've said, Josh) – and so this became much more character driven. Josh was based upon people that I know, because there are guys out there whose faith seems intimidating. I must admit that, like with "Guard My Heart," the characters started doing things, unbidden by me – this time, all I really knew about Molly's history was that she had been angry at the vampire that changed her. I didn't know that I was going to end up killing of Josh's sisters, or give Molly a horrible past life, but I realized, as I wrote, that's just what had happened.

I'm one of those people with about twenty beginnings to stories saved on my computer, but I'm always terrified that they are cliché and unoriginal. In fan fiction, I found that the basic elements to the story were already there – and so the nerves subsided when I had less to worry about. This story is branching out as I've become braver – the Cullens are still there, but they aren't the principal characters (that, and everyone is running out of story ideas for them). My dad says that this is like getting a free education in writing – and while I'm unable to go to school, I will make use of it.

Since it's best to write what you know, I wrote about a moral conflict. I am a teenager, and a Christian, so I understand where both Josh and Molly come from. However, I've never been asked out, much less on a date, so I have a much harder time writing fluffy romance – in fact, if you've read "Guard My Heart," then you'll have noticed a trend – I just avoid it all together! Hopefully, I'll try and remedy some of that aversion in the sequel. (Just a spoiler to whet your appetite).

A few things I've learned from this experience (which was the entire point of it):

- I'm dash happy. In middle school, I was comma happy, so I tried to wean myself off them by using other forms of punctuation. Sadly, poor mister semi-colon, the nice halfway of rhythmic grammar, has become sorely neglected. (If you really want to appreciate the art that is grammar, I want to recommend Constance Hale's _Sin and Syntax_, a really good book about how grammar creates tone and rhythm and lyricism – it really helped the way I approach my writing, and is great for those in AP English classes that would like to know how to better analyze prose.)

- I just don't divide up paragraphs well. They tend to get long, which is off-putting to readers. In following my stats, I noticed that people seemed to give up after the first or second chapter, where this problem is most visible. I apologize – writing should be reader-friendly (unlike this author's note, which is also parenthesis heavy)

I sincerely hope that you liked this story, and I hope that you enjoy my future work, as well as my past work.

Until next time!

Judith, a.k.a. "thesunshinekid"


	19. Extra: Nathan's Point of View

**Author's Note: Here's chapter two – the first day of school – in Nathan's point of view, as promised. I had a lot of fun writing this – trying to see these vampires from an outside, human perspective. ****Also – at the end, how Eclipse rocked my world.**

Chapter Two:

The New Kids

[Nathan's P.O.V.

Honestly, I wasn't very impressed. The school building was like a block – four stories of nondescript bricks and large square windows with industrial lights in the classrooms behind them. The teenagers entering the building were similarly unremarkable. I glanced down at my jeans and vintage concert tee – I'd fit in fine with this boring crowd.

Natasha had stepped out of the car behind me, the look on her face one of an animal being lead to the slaughter. I stifled a sadistic laugh – she was too nice for these rich kids; my sister would flounder here.

I heard the bubble of excited chatter as I took a step towards the ominous building. I'd been noticed. A giggly blonde girl – skinny and all arms and legs, I took her for a freshman – whispered to her friend while pointing at me. I knew that I looked good – in fact, I'd been informed that it would be hard to find my equal (excepting a good-looking loner on the newspaper staff).

Thankfully, not all eyes were on my sister and me as we made our way into the school – it seemed we weren't the only new kids today. I joined the throngs watching as a gorgeous group moved graciously from a small car. The driver was a lanky guy with dark curly hair – by all means average, yet unnaturally beautiful – I recognized my aunt's description of that "wonderful Joshua Johnson" she'd recommended to Natasha. The front passenger was a bronze-haired boy who dressed like a model, and behind him was a brunette beauty, dressed casually in jeans and a sweater. He took her hand, and I could swear I heard a gasp from the engrossed girls around me.

The final member of the group must have been the driver's younger sister. She had his same curly hair, held back by a headband; she dressed stylishly, and was by far the most entrancing of the group. I pushed away the nagging in my head. _I made a resolution._

I didn't see the girl again until Tony was introducing me to his own personal fan club. She stood further down the hall, the only one not jockeying for a view of the new kids. As she was approached – and apparently surprised – by her brother and his friends, I noted the smoothness of their walk, the almost cruel beauty of each face, the pallor of their skin. All four had deep shadows under liquid golden eyes.

They exuded a sort of coldness – thought their attractiveness was plain, the other students unconsciously walked a little further away from them. It was like a magnetic force drawing the students away from these strange people.

I saw the odd glance of the bronze-haired boy as he followed my gaze. I turned back to Tony's blathering, trying to pay attention.

_I wasn't going to let myself be tempted. They were avoided at this school – they were a challenge. But I wouldn't let myself think about that._

I watched the pretty girls surrounding me as they moved away to their respective classes. Would these naïve, innocent children find out about my dark past? Will they see through my façade, to who I truly was? I had turned over a new leaf, to be sure, but I knew the past could follow you like a bad odor.

Tony had assured me that in this town, your past could be quickly dealt with, covered up, eliminated even. Relatives with money certainly worked to my advantage.

As a part of my new lease on life, I was determined to focus on school, to evade temptation. I paid little heed to the watchful, gossiping crowd as I entered my chemistry class – though I heard a distinct gasp and, "He's in this class."

I took my seat next to the beautiful girl with the bouncy curls that had given me no attention since I had arrived. She sat quietly, flipping through the textbook – obviously smart, and obviously bored. The girl behind her leaned forward, and I tuned in to the conversation.

"Molly?" She asked, and I assumed that was curly-haired-girl's name. I watched her stiffen, as if she tasted the air, before turning to reply.

"Who was that amazing guy with your brother this morning? Does he have a girlfriend?"

"That's Edward Cullen; his adoptive father was good friends with our dad." She seemed to consider her next words carefully, as if she was expecting some sort of horrified response. "His girlfriend's the brunette you might have seen him walking with, Bella Swan – a foster child of the Cullen's."

The girl (Morgan Winters, I learned) took a sharp breath inward before thanking Molly for the information.

As the teacher droned on about class rules and expectations, I found myself watching the oblivious girl next to me. She seemed to care little for his words either.

_She's beautiful. She's a challenge. You live for this – the girl who won't just deny _you_ the time of day – she doesn't associate herself with anyone. Imagine the thrill of the chase. _

_No!_ My mind screamed. I felt like I had the angel and the devil on my shoulders, whispering into my ears. My resolve was slipping; my best intentions were not enough. Was there any point in pushing against this desire inside of me? I was weak – I had fallen to temptation before. I was going to fail – what is the point of being good when I know that I'm inherently evil.

_No!_ My mind was losing its momentum. I had myself convinced – the last vestiges of my conscience were slowly dying.

She was drawing on an old fashioned sketchpad. I looked over at the photo of the smiling boy she'd walked with this morning – her brother. I decided to establish my interest.

"Boyfriend?" I asked. I watched as she hesitated, her eyes moving out of focus and back in so quickly that I had almost missed it – again, as if she was checking her surroundings for something.

"Brother," she replied lightly, as if she had not visibly tensed less than a moment earlier.

"It's very good – it almost looks real." I commented. I was telling the truth – it was an excellent drawing – almost better than the original; a boy who could probably find no comparison throughout the history of the earth – even I could recognize that.

She thanked me, and then turned back to the sketch, intending to ignore me. I could not have that.

"Do you know that you're the prettiest girl I've ever seen?" It was important to cement my "naïve honesty" image early.

She seemed taken aback by my declaration. Her short "thank you" did not match the cautious but genuinely kind tone of her earlier words. I smiled as she hurried from the room, very obviously flustered.

_Don't think about it Nathan! _I was losing a battle that I had little willingness to fight to begin with.

_She doesn't deserve this._ I couldn't muster any sympathy. I had lost the battle.

_Molly Johnson will be next_

**Author's note: Does this seem Nathan-****ish**** enough? Does this change your opinion of him at all?**

**Funny Story: ****"How Eclipse Rocked My World" **

**The day Eclipse arrived (I got it on the 8****th****), I was in the shower, and my good friend – let's call her "duh" (because we actually do), was staying with me, since my parents were out of town. While I was reading Eclipse, she was eagerly devouring New Moon, since**** she'd decided to read the series while staying. I finished Eclipse at ten-thirty, and handed it over to her, knowing that she'd stay up to read some of it.**

**I've said before that I have chronic fatigue syndrome – and I have trouble falling asleep right away. So, it was around one in the morning, and I was thinking about Eclipse (because it gave me plenty to think about), and waiting to fall asleep, when I felt a shake like a door banging (because, in California, the houses are built to shake), and wondered if it was Duh. A moment later, I was thrown into consciousness by a relatively ****large rolling-jolting for a few more seconds**

**So basically, post earthquake, ****I call out to ****Duh****, who**** runs upstairs, clutching Eclipse – claiming that Edward would protect us. It was only a 4.5, but I was more than a little freaked out by the prospect of aftershocks (in the Northridge quake in '92, all the deaths and damage came from the aftershocks, which were worse than the original shaking). Thankfully, I didn't have to worry about turning off the electricity or d****eath by ceiling fan. I****f you've never been in an earthquake, then you must realize that it's one of those things where you remember where you were and how you felt and reacted and what you were thinking**** (I can recall some four other instances)****. And ****this time, ****I was thinking about Eclipse.**

**So, there's my random, not-so-funny, story. There ****ya**** go.**


	20. Extra Numero Dos

Extra Numero dos:

The Sequel has arrived! The continuation of the Johnsons' story, from Lisa's point of view is entitled "On My Own," and will be posted later today.

Don't worry; we'll be seeing plenty of the Cullens (after all, the entire UK is smaller than California, and the Cullens and Johnsons are living within three hours of each other – less if a vampire is driving!) I'm having a lot of fun with this one.

It's not completely written the way So Fair and Foul a Day was, though my outline is far more detailed. I'll try and make updates a regular thing.

Finally, don't forget to watch out for my one-shots; I've got plenty outlined, and have found that they're a great cure for writers block.

Lotsa love,

Judith (thesunshinekid)


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